1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Are you open to persuasion?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by PatrickUK, Aug 23, 2020.

  1. PatrickUK

    Advisor Full Member Away

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2014
    Messages:
    6,229
    Likes Received:
    1,461
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    As the title says, are you open to persuasion, or do you have quite fixed positions on issues? What are you uncompromising about? When you say no, does it mean no?

    What does someone have to do to persuade you? Do they have to work hard to change your mind?
     
  2. BlueMonday

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Dec 17, 2017
    Messages:
    256
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Earth
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
  3. HM03

    Moderator Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 2, 2013
    Messages:
    1,971
    Likes Received:
    261
    Location:
    Pergatory
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Two different realms for me.

    1) Big topic issues that are "controversial" and hot topics (think things that are often political) - I can often change my mind. When presented with analogies, facts and sound research, then of course I'm open to changing my mind

    2) For things directly in my life, like if I can help with something, do something etc, I HATE persuasion. So many people are flat out rude and will take advantage of "givers" and keep "taking" from them. No means no, and people need to respect that. Not even in a sexual sense, but if you keep pushing for a "yes", is it really a yes?
     
  4. QuietPeace

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Aug 12, 2020
    Messages:
    371
    Likes Received:
    152
    Location:
    Northern Europe
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    A few people
    On some subjects I am open and can discuss things, IF the other person can remain respectful that I also have my own opinions or way that I want to live my life. If I say no and someone tries to push me then I get very angry as I am tired of people trying to force me to be or believe exactly as they do.
     
  5. Chip

    Board Member Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2008
    Messages:
    15,018
    Likes Received:
    2,948
    Location:
    northern CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Getting talked into something? Pretty much no. I'm big on boundaries. No means no.

    Changing position on a factual issue based on new, credible information that invalidates older information? Absolutely open to that. Only way to be intellectually honest.

    Persuasion on changing personal values? Unlikely. For example, dating a person who smokes or uses drugs (or alcohol to excess) would be a hard no. Likewise with someone who has significantly different political beliefs.
     
  6. Unsure77

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 20, 2019
    Messages:
    322
    Likes Received:
    229
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    All but family
    Yes, and no. I have a base set of underlying principals that have been lifelong. A lot of my political and religious beliefs have changed and are changing (in some cases dramatically) as I’ve learned more over the years. New (credible) information and seeing things from new perspectives are what can sometimes change my opinion sometimes. I usually can’t be pushed into it. I usually kind of take the new info in, go away and think about it and weigh it out, and then settle in on an opinion.
     
  7. Tightrope

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2013
    Messages:
    4,912
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Not completely fixed. But when you get to a certain point in life, you've made up your mind on how to view most things, so they can't do much that will work to change my mind. Politics is one topic. Another might be thoughts about how people behave and why, and pop psychology. The intended meaning is neutral or positive - psychology that is useful and usable by everyday people, so not psychology as a fad.

    This can be another thread. I have met people who, months and even years later, do not understand this basic concept and trespass. You cannot be friends with people like this and I've seen it's better to unhinge from them sooner rather than later.
     
  8. OGS

    OGS
    Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 1, 2014
    Messages:
    2,663
    Likes Received:
    677
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Obviously when the facts change or come to light I can change my opinions. Generally speaking I would say my values aren't really subject to persuasion but the fact of the matter is that over time as my life experience has grown they have evolved and I have no reason to believe that couldn't continue.
     
  9. Vega222

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jun 28, 2015
    Messages:
    361
    Likes Received:
    25
    Location:
    Iran
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Like some of other said here, about politics, religion and such things I am open about changing my opinions. Much more than most people.
    But about life decisions mostly not. Like if someone insists I do something or say something, having heard no from me before. I don't like that.
     
  10. Tightrope

    Full Member

    Joined:
    May 31, 2013
    Messages:
    4,912
    Likes Received:
    191
    Location:
    USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    When it comes to practical or business decisions, this would apply. Smarter people will change their views as new information becomes available. Values, which might include politics, religion, and approaches to life, are less likely to change through persuasion but possibly through personal epiphanies.

    Right. Because people shouldn't be interfering here. One of the worst types of interference is unsolicited matchmaking. If input is said correctly, a person can listen to the suggestions. For me, it has only been useful a few times. Most people can and should make their own life decisions.
     
  11. silverhalo

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2008
    Messages:
    10,031
    Likes Received:
    3,161
    Location:
    England,
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    I think it totally depends what the situation is. I wouldn't say I can be made to do things to fit in with the crowd or because of peer pressure. However if I am discussing a topic and someone has a difference of opinion, as long as they can explain why their opinion is better then yeah I'm open to changing my mind.
     
  12. Chip

    Board Member Admin Team Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    May 9, 2008
    Messages:
    15,018
    Likes Received:
    2,948
    Location:
    northern CA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    100% agree. It's unfortunate, because for those who don't understand that concept, it's their own wound causing the problem, but it's not something I need to be a part of.
     
  13. Destin

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Mar 14, 2018
    Messages:
    2,025
    Likes Received:
    687
    Location:
    The United States
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    If someone can prove to me that the new thing benefits me or society in general more, then yes. Otherwise I'm kind of stubborn. No rarely means no when it comes from me to be honest, I can be talked into doing a whole lot of things.
     
    #13 Destin, Aug 30, 2020
    Last edited: Aug 30, 2020
  14. PatrickUK

    Advisor Full Member Away

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2014
    Messages:
    6,229
    Likes Received:
    1,461
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You know this anyway, but you need to work on that from a personal and professional perspective.