Anyone got depression because of sexulity ? I'm looking for hope.

I would underline Xtian99's excellent post !!!!

Depression comes out of inner conflicts … and about when things in life are not going to some pre-conceived plan. Talk therapy may be really good for you to examine these things !!

 

maybe coming off the meds might help, tell the doctor your concerns, i would. if you put on weight, take long walks, get out, be free, be happy!

hope this helps!!!

 

As many others above, I am pretty sure that supressing emotions and having 'sexuality issues' has been the cause of my depression since my late teens. I am now 41 and only coming to terms with things, I've come out as 'not straight' to my family and close friends. I have a long way to go but feel much better about myself after a very tough year.

 

I also think that my depression had a bit to do with my sexuality. I grew up in a very homophobic place where my feelings were not accepted. I would also become very attached to my girlfriends, but they would never feel the same way and that made me feel rejected.

I also had an idea that I was different which contributed more to the isolation. Life just sucked as a teen.

Right now, my depression has to do with sexuality as well as gender issues. I'm trying my best to accept how I feel without judging myself.

 

After I realized I was gay and began accepting it, I was faced with the decision on whether to come out. I was married at the time and I have kids. I knew that coming out would mean huge changes for all of us and that it would greatly hurt my ex-husband. I became very depressed because of it, which also led to great amount of weight loss. Once I did decide to come out, and after the initial roller coaster, the depression began to dissipate. Now, 3 months later, it's almost gone. There are some days it's there, but now it's because I'm rebuilding my life and my identity which can be a little lonely. It didn't take long after I came out for the depression begin improving.

 

I think depression is part of our epic journey to find ourselves.

I see that situation like you live in a windowless hut. People come and tell you about their huts without windows. Some try to describe outside. However I think unless you find your own window on the wall you won't be truly happy. Pills and medications just help to ease pain and conceal the real problem.

What I've learned from my depression deep, dead years?

- Being gay or bi or whatever you are ain't the biggest problem in the world. There are people who are straight but have harder time then yourself. I listened a story of a woman who had to face a rumor about her being a slut in her town when she was a teenager... source of that rumor was her own mother. A mother's worries of her schizophrene son whose denying any offer to help and keep rolling deeper into a pit... her arms were tied.

Those and many people passed my life by had their own share of problems but still they could say "Life is good" and try to face everyday with a smile.

- If you thing yourself as a victim then you are the victim. You can blame starting life several steps behind by born as a gay. Why you have to suffer while others prevail? Okay, life is not fair... justice ain't something invented by God. It is created by humans for humans. If God is fair as everyone claims, everyone should be starting life equally. No more births with gays, blinds, physical or pyhscological ailments and more importantly no more races.

Then again here we are with people of different colors, tongues, nations, religions, sexual and gender identities. We mostly create injustice by labeling those people as different or worse as wrong. Are we better than the creator? We all born as who we are. This is our first challenge in life. I believe in God and know he knows better than me or anyone on the world. If he saw it is okay for me to born this way, there is a silver lining to it... like making me an open minded person who tries to understand and accept everyone as they are. I think world need more people like that to find peace.

- Never pity yourself. If you have to pity for someone, pity the world, people who can't understand we are not created equally. We are colors that makes painting of life less dull. Like watching monotone poles from a train window, life passes by. Every person we met is put another memorible thing to pasture. You are beautiful part of this picture. You will mean something in someone's life. Pity makes you blind to that beauty, to this life.

In the end like I said, everyone has to find their own window to see world. Hope you won't give up the search and never stop, even for one minute, remembering how beautiful and important you are. This universe means nothing without you.

God! Sorry for long post.

 

I had a couple episodes of depression related to my sexuality. One when I was about 16, a very brief one when I was 20 (which lead to my first relationship) and the worst one last summer, age 25 (which led me to my second relationship, to come out to my friends and to start therapy). I never got suicidal thoughts, self-harm or anything of the kind. Neither I got medication, but still I had that feeling when everything loses its colours and its scents. You don't feel like eating, sleeping or having sex... I think you know what I'm talking about.

Starting a path of self-acceptance last year was the cure for this. It's not been easy: I had spent so many years hiding carefully who I was, that when I started to come out to my friends, I woke up in the morning with the thought "OH GOD, NOW THEY KNOW" and I felt unsafe. Of course that was just the old phobia kicking in, but in a couple of months I got rid of it. Also, I can tell you that at first I felt like I had to "justify" myself for not being straight. Just one year later it's a whole different story: I'm like this, sorry if you don't like it.

The problem with medication is that they cure (or just numb) the symptoms, but the cause is always there. If you can't get any therapy, isn't there a chance you can find a LGBT group in your area? I'm sure that just talking with somebody about this will make you feel better

 

I've had anxiety and depression for most of my life. I recall suicidal thoughts as early as age 11, though I've never acted on them. As I got older the mental health issues got worse, as I went untreated until around age 24. I'm not sure if sexuality was the cause, but it's certainly been an aggravating factor at times. I've always felt isolated and different from others. Having feelings that I couldn't understand or talk about, and lacking feelings I was "supposed" to have only made me feel like even more of a freak. I've improved a lot since I've been in treatment. I see a therapist every few weeks, and I'm on SSRIs. I still get my low periods or my periods of high anxiety, though. And going through this questioning process has definitely been causing both depression and anxiety to rear their ugly heads, and swallow me up in their dark maw at times. I'm hoping as I gain better self understanding things will begin to lighten. They already have some as compared to how I felt at the very beginning of this process. Still, I worry I won't ever really be able to get myself "out there" to meet people and will remain isolated. Baby steps, I guess.