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Androgynous or something else ?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Rainbow Misfit, Sep 27, 2014.

  1. Rainbow Misfit

    Regular Member

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    Location:
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    Gender:
    Androgyne
    So….. Recently I found out about androgyny and how you are both male and female or neither at the same time…. Kind of made my mind flip with excitement when I did too.

    Basically, I’ve always felt different, I never fit in with girls and never fit in with boys either …, I still kind of don’t fit in anywhere.

    I have memories from my childhood where I wanted to pee standing up like guys but nothing much else that would classify me as really being male. Hell, I’m not even sure what I am now.

    For the last 6 years or so I’ve gone through bits where I thought I may be completely male or completely female but then I’ll feel… weird, like I'd be making a mistake if I picked one.I mean I’ve never really cared about what I have downstairs but then when I get my monthly’s it just feels… wrong or off or something.

    Its what’s upstairs that bugs me most of all though.
    I only really started noticing my chest when they were big enough to classify me as a girl and not a flat chested child.
    The first time I binded was maybe 14, granted it was with cling wrap and I ended up with a rash but I liked myself a lot more when my chest was flat , not like small boobs flat, Like Boy flat.

    I didn't do it again for awhile but never really liked the fact I had boobs , downstairs I can sort of live with but upstairs just feels like it shouldn't really be there.

    Like if someone told me I had to get them cut off because of a breast cancer scare I’d jump at that faster than most people and be fine with a totally flat chest.
    .... I want what guys have upstairs but am unsure about downstairs, I ended up buying a few binders but they were cheap and always left a little bulge ,and I was always aware my boobs were just THERE....

    I mean my boobs are just in the way , I think I only like them when I get dressed up to go out but only because they complete the look of normal everyday girl,... but could that just be my family talking?? They want me to be a normal every day girl who acts just like any girl would
    ...but sometimes I want to dress up...But I want to look more like a boy dressing up as a girl then a girl just dressing up girly-er....does this make any sense??


    I’ve found out about an androgynous model and the first thought I had when I saw him was that, that is what I want to look like, more than anything, I think I would like it a lot more if people assumed I was something other than female.
    So thing is does this sound like I'm androgynous or like something else? …. Can anyone help me figure this out? Is there anyone out there like this???
     
  2. Starfleet

    Starfleet Guest

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    Hi Rainbow. :slight_smile: I'm pretty new to these Gender issues as well. I'd say that your excitement about being Androgynous is a good indicator of what you want. I'd say to continue exploring these feelings. It's still early around here, more people with more advice will be here to help. :slight_smile:
     
  3. jay777

    Regular Member

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    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    You might have a look at this:
    Am I Transgender or Transsexual - Teens Wonder Am I Transgender or Transsexual
    and this:
    http://emptyclosets.com/forum/gender-identity-expression/150966-androgyne-identity.html#14

    The transgender spectrum goes i.e. from people living with almost androgynous appearance, to styling more like the preferred gender, to taking hormones, to srs.
    Of course the list is not all possible options.
    It's up to you to collect further information...
    You might also for example talk to a gender therapist or someone from an lgbt center, if that's what you want.

    I would do things I'm comfortable with, don't feel pressured to do something... its your decision...
    There is no only one right way to do this.
    Its your choice what you want to do...
     
  4. ctrl alt delete

    Regular Member

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    Out to everyone
    I started off my gender identity journey by being attracted to the androgynous look, I think what matters more is what you psychologically feel. I'd encourage you to read up on non binary gender identities :slight_smile: might help you figure yourself out a bit more!

    also welcome (*hug*)
     
  5. AsheTheHuman

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    Hello! I'm an androgyne myself. I was born male, but feel I lean a little towards the feminine side. Some days I think I wouldn't mind totally presenting as a female! I totally relate to the sentiment that you want to look like a guy dressing up as a girl. I feel the opposite! Anyways, I do highly recommend reading though that androgyne identity thread. Me and a couple users pretty thoroughly shared our feelings as androgynes. If you have more questions, feel free to ask! Good luck!
     
  6. Kanes

    Regular Member

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    jesus, I thought I was the only one hehehe
    I'm just like you, and I'm demi-pansexual. Pan-demisexual, and I always wanted to look like a boy, but I dont wanna be a boy.

    I heard it's agender what we are, but I'm cool being a girl, you know? I like girl things, but also boy things, if that's even correct, because girl and boy things (toys like cars and barbies, for example) are just a social construct, it's not based on nature. I mean, when I was a girl, I liked to play boy things, like climbing the trees, or just running like crazy, playing in the garden collecting bugs, etc etc I liked that, and then I saw lady marmalade video clip at 12, and I had this fantasy of dressing as the singers, as Christina, Lil Kim, Mya and Pink. I like that kind of clothes, and I like victorian dresses, even sexy lingerie, as COSTUMES. But I like to dress tshirts and jeans everyday. And I like my hair short. And I like men. Not very sure about women, but I'm definitely demisexual about both men and women. I don't fall in love with people inmediately. I mean, I d0nt fall in love with their bodies, because that what it is when you fall in love quick, or love at first sight. It's superficial. If it turns in somthing real after the horniness is passed, it's love, but at first... I doubt it. I fall in love after an amount of time, after getting intimate and confident with another person.

    But I'm like this. I dont know if I'm tomboy, or agender, I dont know, and I'm seriously tired of figuring it out, may be we should stop giving names to everything. In this society where knowledge is the most important things over sentiment, it's getting sick naming everything, like we want to put everything in separated boxes. But I know I could one of these concepts you have made up, which one I don't, but I know men won't like me the way I am. One wil, may be, one very unusual in his tastes, but not the average, and that scares me, because may be he'll never show up, especially if I cut off my breasts as I have planned. It will probably suck the enterity of my first year of work, but... I feel I'm not gonna feel comfortable with myself until I get rid of them. I was such a happy girl before them... even thinner and more athletic, and if I don't do this, I will keep feeling like this.
     
  7. FireSmoke

    FireSmoke Guest

    Androgyny as Gender Identity is one of the most complicated Genders I have never knew.

    I'm not good to give good suggestions in this period because we are in the same boat. But I think describing how I feel could be useful for you.

    I have always felt that there is a man inside my soul. Since I was 2 years old. And I didn't get along with girls in my classroom. Sometimes yes, sometimes not. I have always thought: "What I have to do with them? I am different from them."
    I had some female friends who expected that I was like them. But I discovered that I wasn't like them, but different.

    But I don't really get along with guys, as well. I feel different from them the same! But not because I'm not a man inside, but because I have something more. No cisboy can be like me, because I am a fusion between a man and a woman (90% man and 10% woman).

    This makes me feel a little uncomfortable sometimes. For example, when I have to choose a public bathroom. Men's or Women's?

    I'd choose Unisex's. Because I am not a woman but I am not the stereotyped man, the conventional man, too.

    Unfortunately, we live in a binary society, so I often have to fit in the binary sistem. When I can, I go for "Men's" but when I cannot, I go for "Women's".

     
    #7 FireSmoke, Nov 2, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 2, 2014