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And here I am

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Caraldo, Mar 11, 2020.

  1. Caraldo

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    Well, after many delays, and lots of money, I am divorced. Her and I are on relatively good terms. I thought that I would have more of a sense of anguish, because no matter what has transpired, and the disastrous results of of staying together for over 15 years after it was obvious that I was gay, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t travel there. I have noticed though we have been split for so long, having an official status of single has made me feel even freer. I am just so happy to be living authentic me.
     
  2. Pole star

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    Congratulations and best wishes
     
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  3. BiGemini87

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    Congratulations! May both you and your ex-wife find happiness in your newfound freedoms.:slight_smile:
     
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  4. Jesuis moi

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    Congratulations best wishes .
     
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  5. Caraldo

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    Well just thought I would jump on with an update. Covid kinda slowed things, but the first of June I moved back into my house. I have very honestly lost some friends. I am living my truth and it makes some people uncomfortable. Nobody has been terrible to me. But I like the freedom of not hiding my personal truth.
     
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  6. LostInDaydreams

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    I’m sorry that you have lost some friends, but the freedom must be such a relief and I’m glad you’ve there.

    Do you think your friends might come around with time?
     
  7. Caraldo

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    @LostInDaydreams I am beyond worrying about those I have lost. I have struggled to present a certain way, but I get laughing or heaven forbid a few drinks in me in me and I am a little bit on the stereotypical side. So a lot of people suspected for years and some feel “betrayed”. Whatever, I am going forward. Hope all is well with you. Congratulations on being a moderator.
     
  8. Contented

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    Caraldo, congrats on your liberation! I too lost quite a few “ friends “ after coming out. I question now whether they were truly friends. As I came to accept who I was, my behavior would fall into the realm of stereotypical not because I was intentionally doing it however it turned out to more the real me. It was a relief! Go with it if that is who you are. I guarantee you will be happier if that is the case.
     
  9. LostInDaydreams

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    That’s a good attitude to have - this is about you, not them and if they feel betrayed then you are most probably better off without them.

    I’m well, thanks. And thank you. :slight_smile:
     
  10. Caraldo

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    @Contented I really never understood how much energy I put into controlling myself. My ex-wife used to make snarky comments at times...especially if I was tired. Finally my closest friend, her and I are like brother and sister, over 40 years of friendship told me that I was somewhat effeminate and I really didn’t need to hide it, because I was only successful in doing so part of the time. I am so much more relaxed
     
  11. Snowqueen

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    So good that you and your ex wife are getting along. It always helps to have a friendly face in your corner. I remember in my last when I told an ex girlfriend that I thought I might be gay,it didn't end very well and has put me off of telling anyone rea!ly. I am out to my best friend who is female and its so refreshing to be able to be me and we meet up. Do you feel like you have been released and have you always had an efiminate side.
     
  12. Caraldo

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    @Snowqueen I definitely feel less restricted when I am not so guarded.
     
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  13. Snowqueen

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    That makes sense, my best friend who knows I'm gay, is female and its so easy to be myself around her. Women seem to be more accepting then men do.
     
  14. KeLeWi

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    Congratulations on living your authentic life. While it is not without costs, the price will be well worth it. Best wishes to you.