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Am I non-binary because I dress androgynously?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by Stitchy, Apr 15, 2020.

  1. Stitchy

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 15, 2020
    Messages:
    27
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    7
    Location:
    My head
    Gender:
    Male (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    All but family
    I'm a trans guy. I've known for 3 going on 4 years now. I feel more comfortable using he him pronouns and going by "Shy". However, there are some days I dress really androgynously. Like, I'll wear overalls and this yellow shirt with flowers. My glasses are clear which adds to it. I hate dresses and skirts still though. Yet, there was this outfit I still really like. It was this light yellow shorts with black leggings underneath and that same yellow shirt. I really like that outfit a lot. But it makes me question myself.

    I've had people tell me that if I'm trans I can't dress androgynously. That I have to dress like a guy. Yeah ok Dressing in that last outfit makes me kind of dysphoric but it doesn't mean I can't wear it right? So I started wondering if I'm a masculine non-binary person. But I still feel comfortable with he/him and being seen as male.

    I'm just confused. Any advice?
     
  2. ChescaC

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Apr 6, 2013
    Messages:
    209
    Likes Received:
    76
    Location:
    Albuquerque NM
    Gender:
    Female (trans*)
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    You can most definitely be trans and dress in an androgynous way.
    You can be a trans masculine individual and have feminine styles.
    Don't let other peoples insecurities dictate what you think of yourself.
    If you like outfits or articles of clothing, and are comfortable in them, they in no way dictate your own personal identity.
    If someone has an issue in how you dress, either because it doesn't match how they perceive someone should dress; it's on them, not you.

    For example, aside the occasional skirt(I avoid them in the winter months) I am almost always in jeans when at work(of which I'm furloughed until next academic year...), my shirt is a standard non-fitted polo. So, I do dress in a very androgynous way for work, for the most part. It doesn't confuse any of my students, They all know me as Chesca(or Francesca).

    But the way we dress ourselves has zero obligation on how we choose to identify.
    For example, someone could be a trans man and decide one day to wear a corset and skirt, but he would still be a man. Or a trans woman could decide she is going to wear a suit for an event, a suit she's had for well over a decade, but she's still a woman. Or either of them could decide they wanted to dress in a way where others couldn't tell, and they need not be androgynous.
     
    #2 ChescaC, Apr 16, 2020
    Last edited: Apr 16, 2020
    LaurenSkye and Marble Jar like this.