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Almost

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Biguy45, May 19, 2018.

  1. Biguy45

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    while watching tv with my wife last night, I almost came out to her. I just couldn’t make myself do it. I’m just afraid it will break her heart. It would be selfish on my part I think. Despite this, I still want to tell someone
     
  2. theamos13

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    I was there many times. A scene in a movie or a comment on the show we were watching but I never could. One day I just told her I was tired of hiding from my best friend and I was willing to take whatever came next.
    My wife said no big deal. I think she suspected anyway.
    Go for it.
    How long have you been married?
     
  3. Biguy45

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  4. IanMkh

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    Her this morning: Harry is so handsome.

    (Yes, indeed.) I almost bit my tongue in half.
     
  5. Jakebusman

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    I have came close too man but dont have the courage I almost did one day but scared but thats a different story
     
  6. Biguy45

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    My wife was commenting on how hot the rock was. I wanted so badly to comment
     
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  7. Jakebusman

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    What you do
     
  8. Biguy45

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    W
    what do you mean
     
  9. Jakebusman

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    When she said he was hot
     
  10. Biguy45

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    I didn’t say anything. Just silently fantasized about it
     
  11. Jakebusman

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    You and me arein the same boat
     
  12. Biguy45

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    Seems so
     
  13. Jakebusman

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    We will make it
     
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  14. Lexa

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    What is your wife's viewpoint on LGBT subjects? What does she think of bisexuality? I think you should start from there. If she's supportive concerning LGBT subjects she probably won't react as bad as you think now.
     
  15. Biguy45

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    Two of our nephews are gay. She seems ok with that. I’ve been sort of feeling her out on the subject. I’ll get there eventually
     
  16. theamos13

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    Being ok with a niece or nephews being gay is different than your husband.
    On another note commenting on how good looking another guy is does not make you look gay. If your wife says some guy is hot you can agree without being gay. Are you afraid to wear a pink shirt because ppl might think something?
    You have to be secure in yourself before bringing others to the game
     
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  17. Biguy45

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    It’s not me I’m worried about. I’m not sure what a pink shirt had to do with anything. I’ve always worn whatever I want. People can think whatever they want. And I realize nephews are not the same thing but I was answering a question regarding her viewpoints
     
  18. DecentOne

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    I'm not through with the roller coaster of telling my wife -- but I could not imagine coming out to anyone else first, and I could not imagine holding it as a secret from her (that would have created distance between us, and somehow given the impression I don't trust her with my deepest self).

    If you are sure this will cause her pain, what about it might be at the root of the pain? If you are compassionate about where that pain might come from, and think through how you will say things to help it not seem so severe for her, that would be caring (not selfish).
     
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