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Advice for easing in a partner new to being gay

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Crunchy, Oct 1, 2019.

  1. Crunchy

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    Hello! For those of you who remember what your first time being with someone of the same sex was like, do you have any tips for what I can do to make it as easy as possible for them? I presume taking it slow is a given but not sure what this looks like in practice and what else might be appreciated by the other person?

    Alternatively if you were the partner easing someone else in, what worked and what didn't would be really helpful!

    Thanks :slight_smile:
     
  2. Contented

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    When I first started out seeing a same sex partner he was very understanding and took things slowly so I could assimilate and adjust to being with another man. This does take some time for sure. In regards to sex the same applied. It took me awhile to get comfortable with all aspects of same sex intimacy. My BF was very patient as I explored every aspect of gay sexuality. That helped me by allowing me the time I needed to come to totally enjoy our relationship from both an emotional and sexual perspective.
     
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  3. EllisMar

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    I was the one being assimilated but my gf did something you could try too. Let him explore without judgement or fear. My gf let me try anything I wanted. When I wanted to kiss in public for the first time, we did. When I wanted to go down on her but then panicked, it was fine. I like to be more in control but I had NO idea how to same lesbian sex. That was okay too. She let me explore freely and that was such a gift.
     
    #3 EllisMar, Oct 1, 2019
    Last edited: Oct 1, 2019
  4. justaguyinsf

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    Be understanding, caring, and open to your partner.
     
  5. JaymzR1968

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    I’d just add - don’t force it. Let things happen organically. If the mood strikes you or your partner to try something new/different, go with it.