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admitting I might have a feminine side.

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Snowqueen, Jun 21, 2020.

  1. Snowqueen

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    Please bare with me, it's Sunday night downer time. I've started my coming out journey, which seems to be going as well as can be expected, however for the past few weeks, I've noticed that I may have a feminine side. Not in everyday life, I'm pretty sure I'm straight acting and not prissy or camp, no one has ever commented so, though a few have assumed I was gay, which after years of denial, I have finally admitted. I have these thoughts and feelings and dreams where I am wearing lingerie and stockings for a man and the thoughts really turn me on, I don't think I'm trans, I don't want to be a woman, is this a common thing in the gay man's world? And is it accepted or would I be viewed as a freak or a queen?
     
  2. ChescaC

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    Yes you can be feminine and not be trans.
    You can be feminine and be a man, gay or not.
    I’m not sure about in the UK, but I know for certain there are plenty of effeminate gay men where I live, and they are all accepted.


    A side note:
    Before I came out as Trans, I was never very masculine. I also never showed any attraction towards men, so people never assumed I was gay.
    Even when I was a boy, people assumed I was female.
    I can’t remember how many times I was out with my sister and the waiter asked if they could “get anything else for us ladies”
    Even my bosses at work were happy when I came out, having sent a semi cryptic email needing to “discuss a major life change”
     
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  3. Contented

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    I think many gay men have a feminine side. It’s certainly doesn’t mean they are camp or trans they are just themselves. Prior to coming out I would have never acknowledged a feminine side but I had one. I have no issue exhibiting it now. Frankly I feel good about acknowledging it openly and could care less if some people find it uncomfortable. I don’t and that is all that matters. Enjoy exactly who you are. You need not live anyone else idea of what you should be. Life is too short.
     
  4. Snowqueen

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    Hey thanks for the reply, it's comforting to know I'm not alone, with how I feel. I guess if I'm honest, I've always kinda be envious of girls because of the clothes they can wear, however the tights and stockings thing is new though. I haven't had thee opportunity to explore this side of me yet, but I know it's coming.
     
  5. Pinknbloo

    Pinknbloo Guest

    You have a feminine side... Your avatar is feminine, the name you use is feminine. You may be just now consciously realizing it, but your subconscious has been leaking it out for awhile I imagine. With the exception of some asexual or nonsexual beings, I would be inclined to believe that most humanoids have a fem side or part, etc. Some of us have more... Some of us have less. In itself it is nothing but a part of the whole. It does not identify or label, it is not a precursor to anything... The questions are-what will you do with it? Accept it, deny it? Nuture it? Allow it? Stifle it? (bet this hasn't worked) On a metaphysical level feminine energy is said to be magnetic, drawing to it... While masculine is electric, reaching out... Yin, yang, yada yada... So... Again my two cents... Embrace, enjoy, accept, and see what happens
     
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  6. Contented

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    In the end it’s your life and happiness. If you want to wear stockings, garters and thongs and be with a man go for it. I wouldn’t waste a lot of time concerning yourself with whether what you long for is commonplace or not. If it’s you then be who you are. It’s our obligation to live our lives to the fullest. It is what we are meant to do including sexually. Enjoy!
     
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