1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Accepting the truth, being the truth

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by Gayhusband, Oct 26, 2023.

  1. Contented

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Jan 23, 2017
    Messages:
    1,474
    Likes Received:
    2,357
    Location:
    Upstate NY
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Based on your post it would seem that saying you would be dating men if not married is a good indication that you are becoming comfortable with your homosexuality. Wanting a boyfriend and being able to be open about it is another. Internalized homophobia might be the reason you feel connected to your wife. Afraid to take that final step in validating your homosexuality. It sounds like your wife is beginning the process of moving on which may allow you to do the same. Our same attraction doesn’t disappear but get stronger.
     
    Gayhusband likes this.
  2. JT1999

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 4, 2015
    Messages:
    827
    Likes Received:
    543
    Location:
    UK
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    Maybe it’s easier not to compare or think about what you prefer? I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately, and it really is a difficult question to answer. Sometimes when I’ve been in bed with my fiancé my thoughts have drifted to a girl from my past and I asked myself if I’d prefer to be with her in that moment. But it’s a hypothetical, there’s no point in asking the question or answering it. Was I enjoying myself at that moment? Yes. Did I want to stop? No. I think that’s the only questions I need to know the answer to and I’m going to try and stop comparing things. There really isn’t any need for it or the guilt that comes with it. I think if you like both, it’s best just to leave it at that and try not to compare or decide what you prefer.
     
    Gayhusband likes this.