Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by SevnButton, Jul 6, 2018.
@SevnButton thank you for a very inspiring and uplifting thread.
That is tremendous! Congratulations on being courageous. Really happy that it seems things are going fairly well. Of course as time progresses be prepared to have patience as your partner goes through a grieving process. Really happy for you and hope things keep going well!
Thanks @smurf ! Funny, I have no sense of relief or new-found freedom. It's more like the feeling I get when I open the garage door, let the light in and see all the work to be done. My intention is to make my marriage work while adding in a new level of honesty and authenticity. My wife was amazingly OK and supportive yesterday. This morning I think she's struggling and trying to really understand everything I told her.
The morning after! What I did immediately after my disclosure was to approach my wife with working on increasing romance and intimacy.
I needed to show her that I was the same guy. So, I worked at it.
It felt good too. The withdrawing from her had taken a toll and reconnecting was great.
One thing that is so important now is to validate her feelings and continue to offer assurances that your marriage is important.
I proposed to my wife a week or so after disclosure. I asked her to renew our marriage vows.
The assurance that I had/have no plans on going anywhere are very important. Two years post disclosure I remind my wife in some manner, almost weekly, that same thing.
It does take work. The first thing I wanted to do was get with a guy. But, I never pushed it...ever.
Sorry I'm late to the party congrats on getting out of that closet we both needed to be honest with our wives we both did it thanks for helping me with my journey also !