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A new Experience: Drag

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by OnTheHighway, Oct 4, 2021.

  1. OnTheHighway

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    Just when I thought I had gotten in touch with my true self which started some 8 years ago, I managed to open another door with pleasantly unexpected results. Over the weekend I surprised my partner and our friends at a party by hiring a drag queen to help me transform myself into a Diva.

    Making myself vulnerable by doing drag was an immensely liberating experience almost akin to the first steps I took coming out to others way back when. The planning began several months ago after a friend of mine suggested I should try and do drag. Prior to that I really had not given it much thought; but liked the idea of pushing myself to try new things and experiences. But once I agreed and the plans began to unfold, the time leading up to the reveal was intense and my nerves felt like they were on fire.

    Each step of the planning process seemed to allow yet another side of me to open up. From deciding whom I would be as a drag queen, to picking out the dress design, to being sized and getting the clothes made (on me by hand) leading up to the day of preparation each step of vulnerability allowed me to learn more about myself and shed many fears and perceptions. The lines between masculinity and femininity became blurred.

    And when I was made up, wig on, dressed with my high heels on my alter ego awoke! I immediately embraced the Diva that I became. My mannerisms instantly changed along with my voice, the way I walk - everything.

    As I have historically projected a masculine persona, I was surprised at the feminine side of me that lied undisturbed underneath all this time. And upon the great reveal to my partner and all our friends, I had clearly surprised and shocked all of them as well. Not just shocked, but completely floored is a better description.

    I am still understanding the emotions and feelings this experience has brought on. It is an entirely new level of self awareness for me that I need to come to terms with and figure out. And I am excited for the adventure that lays ahead as a result.

    My next reveal is already planned and ready to go for Halloween, I can not wait to see how this next chapter plays out!
     
    #1 OnTheHighway, Oct 4, 2021
    Last edited: Oct 4, 2021
    Unsure77, FireFox, I'm gay and 3 others like this.
  2. Nickw

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    @OnTheHighway

    It sounds like you found a constructive way to learn more about yourself. That's excellent!
     
  3. I'm gay

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    I love this OTH! I wish I could see it.
     
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  4. OnTheHighway

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    You can, when you do it too (well, unless you already have)!! Lol. I can not say the show was impressive. My reveal only lasted about 30 minutes before my feet gave way in the heels I had on and needed to return home. OK, it was both the heals and my nerves that gave way!

    As the raw emotions have been subsiding, I am finding a new sense of liberation is starting to form. Early today I was having a coffee with a neighbour, and as I reflect on our conversation, I sensed that I spoke with some filters off. Its hard to describe. But layers of masculinity is definitely peeling. And not that I find myself becoming flamboyant or effeminate, as I never believe I was like that (aside from the time I “tried those mannerisms on” after coming out). But I do feel as if I am speaking more with my childhood voice free of masculine constraints.
     
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  5. quebec

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    OnTheHighway.....I've never been very involved in the drag scene. I've watched a few drag race episodes and enjoyed them but just haven't gotten really involved. I guess that it's just me...I don't have anything against men doing drag, in fact I think some of them look pretty good. As a matter of fact I think that Ru Paul actually looks fantastic in drag! I'm really happy for you though! :old_smile: If this is something that works for you and that gives you an "entirely new level of self awareness for me" (your words) then I think it's absolutely wonderful! :old_big_grin: So I say Go For It and have a great time!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  6. OnTheHighway

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    Like you I never really embraced drag culture. My partner watches RuPaul religiously, but I can barely remember anyones name! This is not something I did as a path I felt I needed on some new journey. I did drag as a way to get in touch with a part of me that I felt still remained dormant even after my sexual awakening. And it worked!

    I received an amazing reaction from family, friends, neighbors, business associates, and other acquaintances - all of whom have seen the social media videos and have requested I do it again! So, both to make sure I am getting all I can mentally from it and as a way to have more fun with it now that the nerves have subsided I will be making one additional appearance at my towns local Halloween festival. This time the audience will be significantly larger than just the dozen friends from the other week; but I am confident it will be a great time.

    Interestingly, prior to doing it I was told by many of my acquaintances in town that doing drag publicly is some form of right of passage amongst the community here. So, with that additional dosage of peer pressure I and pushing myself to be vulnerable yet again! LOL

    Thereafter, I suspect the dress will be hanging in the closet for good!
     
  7. Chip

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    This is absolutely awesome to hear about... and I'm strongly tempted to say "Pics or GTFO" :slight_smile: I'd love to see the transformation!
     
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  8. OnTheHighway

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    Checking your messages :slight_smile:
     
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