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A Bit of an Update

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by ANewHope4, May 27, 2018.

  1. ANewHope4

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Mar 22, 2018
    Messages:
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    Location:
    Colorado
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    Some people
    It's been a couple of months ago since I posted. My divorce was finalized almost three weeks ago. I'm trying to move on with my life - I found work in a factory which has overall been ok, but the pay isn't enough. I see my kids most weekends, which is good. Life is ok, but meh.

    I'm still getting used to the freedom that I could pursue gay sex or a gay relationship if I wanted to. It's overwhelming - I'm both eager to have sex with a man (finally!) but also freaked out. It feels huge. I suddenly am dealing with internal homophobic thoughts that I don't actually believe. It's more like, where did that come from???
     
  2. slowmo

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jul 10, 2017
    Messages:
    31
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    35
    Location:
    West Coast
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Not out at all
    If it's any comfort, you're not alone. What I'm finding is that my feelings now run the gamut, from optimism and even excitement about all of the delayed opportunities, to fear and self-doubt that it won;t work out and I waited too long. These days I try to give myself permission to move day by day and effort by effort. There is no "master plan." I just keep pushing my own personal envelope, and doing thing that only a few months ago I told myself I could never muster the wherewithal to do. Just remember that you are the only benchmark by which to judge your own progress. God luck exploring!
     
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