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"A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear this?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by RemakeJake, Mar 21, 2015.

  1. RemakeJake

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    I was reading comments and listening to opinions about marriage equality, adoption, etc. Many of the people against said rights said that a baby needs a mom and a dad; two moms or two dads won't suffice.

    While I don't agree with them, I can meet them halfway and see where they're coming from. Personally, this is how I feel:

    There is absolutely nothing wrong with a child having two people they call 'mom' or two people they call 'dad.' That being said, if I have kids and a husband, I'd want a constant, consistent, supportive female figure in their life. Whether it's their grandma, aunt(s), a best friend of me and my (future) husband, whoever. As long as both sexes are a constant presence in the kid's life, I don't see any reason why they can't have parents of the same sex.

    How do you feel about this?
     
  2. BryanM

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    Studies have shown that children that are brought up in gay and lesbian households are just as well off (if not actually better) than their counterparts brought up in heterosexual households. A child also doesn't need their immediate gender figures in their life to be their parents. It really is a silly argument in theory, but especially in practice.
     
  3. bisexual girl

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    i totally agree with you
    i think they can have parents of the same sex !
    i think it's not wrong at all !!!!!!!!!
     
  4. woahthatsboring

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    One of my friends parents are lesbians and the nicest people you'll ever meet! She's pretty well off and did very well in school and attends a great college with a scholarship. My point is, anyone can be great parents you don't need a mom and a dad-- it's a new era and some people need to deal with it
     
  5. Wolf of The Baltic

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    For kids with two dads it protects them from harmful yo mama jokes
     
  6. ellyy

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I don't think it's the sex of the parent that's most important but having both a father- and mother figure in your life, and anyone of any sex can portray those roles.

    But at the end of the day what's most important is love, and love has no gender. :slight_smile:

    ---------- Post added 22nd Mar 2015 at 06:46 AM ----------

    Haven't you heard of yo daddy jokes though? :'((( They're harmful as well.
     
    #6 ellyy, Mar 21, 2015
    Last edited: Mar 21, 2015
  7. SKey

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    Personally, I think that it's ridiculous to think that way. It's not who raised you that's important it's how you were raised(including the environment you lived in). A baby doesn't need a mother and father, that's what society wants people to believe. In the end what a baby needs, what a child needs, is love and support.
     
  8. biguy8

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    Well, I thought this way in the past, even like a year ago. Now, I have seen how my bf dotes on his nephew and is very nurturing. Despite not being sure about kids, I have seen that he and I could make it happen with the right circumstances.
     
  9. davidfreckelton

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    mate you are completely right. if I were to get married to a guy I would want an aunt or something. except my family is catholic and they may not want to have anything to do with me.

    but back to what I was saying : I couldn't have said it my self
     
  10. CuriousLiaison

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    Few people have put this argument as well as Zach Wahls:

    [YOUTUBE]yMLZO-sObzQ[/YOUTUBE]
     
  11. Minamimoto_Fan

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    B-but guys... Imagine the horrors of the infinate amounts of dad jokes and the endless loop of "Go ask your mother." THe horror... The absolute terror...

    In all seriousness, the whole mom and dad are necessary argument falls flat when you bring up single parents.

    All a child needs is love. As long as they have that, then they'll be okay, it doesn't matter whether it's from a hetero couple, a gay couple, a single parent, etc.

    I can't fathom why some would rather children go without a home, stay in an orphanage, or be forced into a toxic foster home (not saying foster homes are bad, I'm talking the special cases where the kids are being milked for money) just because someone that would actually want the child doesn't fit their definition of "an ideal parent."
     
  12. Gandee

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I honestly don't know...I would rather hear the opinion of a child of same sex parents first, when it all grows up.
     
  13. TigerInATophat

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    Society likes to cling to this idea that you need a mother and father to turn out alright, or even that it needs to be your original birth parents raising you (this whole concept of 'mummy and daddy make a baby and have a natural bond') but in truth that's a rather romanticised ideal. Before you even get into the question of same sex parents there's plenty of other family forms that don't fit the traditional mold:

    Some kids are raised by single parents, or grandparents or other relatives. Some live in step families with a different mother or father than their original biological one. Some are raised by one legal guardian who has no relationship to them other than that. Some are adopted. A fair few unlucky ones end up stuck in the system without any family at all because there aren't enough potential adoptive parents, or because the rules are too strict, and yet you have people complaining that those kids shouldn't be offered a happy home just because it would mean having same sex parents.

    And the biggest irony is some kids are raised by both their mother and father, and end up unhappy because either one or both did a poor job of it. There's no guarantee that just because a child gets what society deems to be an ideal family unit that everything will turn out ok.

    What's more it does a disservice to kids growing up with same sex parents or any other non-traditional family form if people are taught to automatically assume that their upbringing (and by extension they themselves) are somehow of a lower standard to those raised in the accepted family unit.

    Not necessarily...

    Nasty kid comes up to kid with two dads:

    Child 1: "Yo mama so fat, she imploded under the weight of her own gravity and her core became superheated, causing her to then explode into a supernova and the remains of her core created a black hole which destroys all matter and thus she does not exist."

    Child 2: "When did you start paying attention in science class?"

    Child 1: "...Oh yes I remember now; I'm an ignorant moron who would never come up with that one. As you were." :lol:
     
  14. Eilin

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I strongly disagree with this. I think unconditional love is the most important factor when raising a child, and whoever can provide that love can raise a child because I feel that is what makes children thrive.
    It's good to have role models of both genders, but since we live in a society, not alone on our little planet, they can be found outside the nuclear family.
     
  15. 1HeadInfiMinds

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I always reply with a picture saying, or refer to Jesus having 2 dads. Then I wait for their comeback and a big debate.
     
  16. RainDreamer

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I grew up in a family with an absentee dad who barely made an impression in my life, then got in a divorced with my mother when I was 10. Despite all hardship in a patriarchal society, my single mother raised my brother and I to adulthood with all her might. So I really hate it if people say that I was missing out on something without a father, because it seems like they are dismissing all the things my mother did and the trial she went through as inadequate.

    I also especially hate it if people say I am messed up because I have no father in my childhood too. I am a girl not because I don't have a father figure in my life, but because I am just a girl, damn it. *rage*:bang:
     
  17. Lyana

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    It annoys me, because I feel it comes from uninformed people, for many of the reasons cited above. I will usually argue, not violently, but I will make it clear what I think. Then move on, because you can't change everyone's mind.

    I am completely for same-sex parenting. The only problem I have with it is increasing the chances of the child being bullied, but my parents are straight and opposite gender, everyone thought I was straight, and I was still bullied for reasons completely non-related to gender and sexual orientation (mine, my parents, whatever). Bullying is something we need to take more seriously, but not by saying "Oh, this and this causes bullying" as though it's somehow the victim's fault. It's everyone else we need to fix.
     
  18. ForNarnia

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    As long as kids have both male and female role models in life, I think they would be fine. I have a mum and a dad, and personally, I class my granddad as more of a role model than my dad. (That's not to say I don't love my dad or anything) My point is, your male and female role models need not be your parents
     
  19. happydavid

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    I'm in a single parent household and it worked out okay. It's just 2 dad's instead of 1
     
  20. Yami

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    Re: "A baby needs both a mother & father in its life" How do you feel when you hear t

    So many people are without a dad or a mom, for different reasons. I think it's way better to have two dads or moms than none.