My sons graduated from high school this last week. It's kind of an emotional time. I got to thinking that there was something that could have happened about now,and this would not be a good time for it. Then I remembered -- it was a year and a half ago, when I first got onto Empty Closets, when I was coming to realize I needed to come out to my wife. @quebec (hi David!) said it took 18 months for him, and I chose that much time as my own goal. Things happened faster than I had imagined. It's been 11 months now since having The Big Talk with my wife. I'm really glad I didn't wait any longer. It hasn't been easy, but it feels right to be on the path toward authenticity.
Though I’m not where you are yet, I’m definitely glad I have finally been open entirely with my husband. The road ahead may be long, but I’m glad to begin it. I like thinking about being on the road to authenticity as well!
I am glad to read that you don't have regrets on having come out to your wife earlier, than you thought it would be. Having the feeling of 'it feeling right,' is the best confirmation you will ever have. Becoming and being authentic with yourself, and with others around you, is definitely not an easy process but looking at how far you have come since joining EC, that is something to be proud off.
Sevn.....So glad that things have worked out for you! Everybody has their own timeline...whatever works out best for their particular situation. The important part is that we come to accept who we really are and that, in time, we are able to share ourselves with those who are important to us. I'm not out to the world, only my wife and oldest son as well as a few very close friends. Some of those coming outs were really tough but knowing that there are people who care about me and accept me as I am makes my life so much better than all those years (decades) of hiding in fear. @Sevn....congratulations of the graduation of your sons and on being who you really are!! .....David
I too thought it would take much longer but a combination of encouragement from therapy, this site and an overwhelming sense of self-acceptance brought me out way ahead of schedule. On top of all this I’ve been so lucky to meet and fall in love with a man who went through almost the same story a decade ago. His advice, encouragement and shoulder to lean and sometimes cry on has been amazing. I’ve never been more connected to another human being and this has helped teach me to connect with others. His kids & mine (all in their 20s) are joining us for Fathers Day on Sunday. It feels like such a huge step.
