I am completely discouraged with other women. I don't know whether I should give up. This is the way I figure it: there are some women who would like me if they gave me a chance but I believe that I will never meet them. I have lost all hope. Can anyone tell me something that will cheer me up? I can't stop being a lesbian, I would if I could, but I am getting no encouragement from anyone. The scene for lesbians is a wasteland, most of them are dysfunctional, sexually and emotionally. I am not saying I am perfect, I'm not, but I am normal with normal body, drives and ability to love. I feel I am being forced into the closet again. ITC2 - closet second time around. What a laugh.
Firstly I feel like you need to love yourself more, what is hard to do, but not impossible. This will raise your self confidence too. Love will come your way, if you allow it. It just takes time. Hugs.
Being a gay man, I can't put myself in your position but if I felt as you do I would have to do something proactive. I'm a list maker, so I would make a list of what I would want my life to look like. Next, I would put together a list of steps to get there. Everyone always says to ’put yourself out there. But they never tell you what that means. For me it means getting out and interacting with people I don't know. Volunteer with an LGBTQ group in my area. Seek out learning opportunities, workshops, or speakers on LGBTQ topics. Research LGBTQ social events. I would do whatever it took to reach my goal. It all starts with one tiny step. I'm 68 years old, disabled, and live a full, happy life. There is light at the end of the tunnel.
Being lonely is rough but you deserve to be loved. Don't slip into thinking you deserve isolation. I'm rooting for you.
Thanks for the encouraging words. I am trying to live a happy life and I have decided that I will keep trying. It also helps me to talk to other people, like in this forum. I know a few lesbians who don't want to date but give me motherly advice which I appreciate. Sometimes their advice helps. I have joined a gay group IRL and whatever happens happens. A kind woman suggested that.
Thank you, Sammy. I really do like being in this forum. Finding it really helped me through a rough time - when I was more upset than I am now. I am happy to be with other people like myself. Even the men on this forum have issues that I can relate to!
I agree with Vintage. Put yourself out there. Take the lead being aggressive looking for a partner. You may have alot of dates and maybe friends. One of these friends may know someone for you. . Male or female we all kiss alot of frogs before the princess or prince.
I am gay, sadly I can't feel the way you feel, I've never really trusted someone to fully date them since I was 16 and lost my boyfriend in a accident. I do know anyone can be discouraged in a relationship, but that does NOT mean you should quit trying to find that one true person. Also, you should NEVER stop being you, it kinda makes you two faced to your true self, most people wanna get to know the real you and not the you the world has created, and if they don't, just don't mind them (I was gonna say **** them, but that may be too rude) also for the sake of your mental health, try not to go back into the closet it isn't that healthy, trust me i know - At age 14 I came out to my Dad and he kicked me out of the house, and said "If you ever show your ****ing gay **** face around here again I will K!ll you" it made me so scared that I knocked on the door put a "Smile" on my face and was like "HAHA! Just joking, did you think i was for real?!" and he believed me that I was joking - It made me so scared I pushed myself back into the closet, it made me so depressed, anxious, and, mad that I couldn't control my feelings, and eventually started hearing voices in my head, so (If s!icide scares you, PLEASE do not read the next sentence, I really don't wanna scare anyone or make anyone upset) I would cut my side of my hips and my wrists until I bled, my dad never found out, still don't know if he knows to this day. (Still talking about s!icide, sorry) At the age of 8 me and my sister she was 15 were on top of a tall building in South Korea, she was lesbian and she couldn't come out to my parents so she jumped. She got tired of EVERYTHING and she didn't make it. (Ok no more talking about s!icide you may read now if you didn't want to read about s!icide) being in the closet for what I know so far, when you don't have a accepting adult or someone like that isn't good. I would advise you to keep trying to find that true ONE Ok after that you said find something to cheer you up. Lets see.... A Meme I made (Took me forever on how to insert this) Some quotes I like: “To be kind to all, to like many and love a few, to be needed and wanted by those we love, is certainly the nearest we can come to happiness.” —Mary Stuawall, and “To be kind to all, to like many and love a few, to be needed and wanted by those we love, is certainly the nearest we can come to happiness.” —Mary Stuart ——— Something that may make you smile You are an amazing, you have a family here is EC, whatever you are going through we are here! You ever need to talk, post a message on my wall and I will try my best to respond, you are not alone!
Thank you very much, Meowz. EC is like a family to me - actually more accepting than my family. I think people on here really care about me. I am going to keep trying, even if I never succeed. I want to keep communicating too. Surely somehow some day this will all work out for me. If it doesn't I don't know why I was fated to have this life. I don't want to change myself, but I don't want to meet a special one because I have given up on love. I don't even know at this point whether I could have sex with anyone. My life is stranger than you could imagine.
