Is this straight homophobia or internalized homophobia?

My friend (19 y/o Christian Male) is very homophobic. I just can't tell if it's straight homophobia or internalized homophobia. I just don't know if I should feel sorry for him or not. I'll add that I am out to him as Bisexual.

They say those who shout the loudest have the most to hide and it sure seems to be his case. He makes it very clear that he dislikes LGBTQ people. He's not comfortable being around them (only reason he's close with me is because I came out to him 2 years into our friendship). The day I did tell him, he asked me what I was into. When I told him how much I enjoy gay oral sex he didn't respond and when I asked why he said "you made me really uncomfortable with that comment". He has preached about how pride shouldn't exist and flags should be burned, blah blah blah. When he started masturbating he used to watch lesbian porn because he didnt want to see dicks. He began his struggle with depression and anxiety early as well.

The other day we shared a hotel room with his brother while on a trip. The 2 of us shared a bed and I guess in the middle of the night I ended up snuggling with him. It woke him up and he pushed me away. The following morning not once but twice he brought it up in front of his brother and complained about me trying to spoon him. Then while I was in the bathroom getting ready I had pink shorts on. I must have appeared naked to him because he walked into the doorway and said "WTF, why are you naked? Oh neverminf you're not" I told him to relax and he said "I would have been pissed if you were naked, if I wanted to see that I'd sneak and do it". Meanwhile his brother would have just laughed it off...

The biggest flag I got was when on 2 separate occasions, we walked into an amusement park (I was along side his brother and he was walking 10 feet ahead alone), I heard him say to himself "I'm definitely straight, look at all these girls". I just found that odd, why question yourself if you're not insecure? One day we were texting about girls and he said "atleast the girls around me are hotter than you"? Is he implying I'm still hot I sent him a mirror pic of my gym progress and you could clearly see my bulge in my shorts so I covered it with an emoji and he still got annoyed with me!

So he has had a couple girlfriends and actively seeks them. He checks them out in public, makes it clear when he sees one he finds attractive, and is sexually active. I assume he's bisexual. I just wasn't sure if I'm reading too much into it and he's just a straight homophobic asshole. I just know at this point if I ever tried to make a move on him he would lose his mind.

 

So him saying gays should go to hell, burn the pride flag, pride shouldn't exist, etc doesn't make him homophobic? That's interesting

 

If he made a move on me I would gladly accept it.

 

Exactly. and on top of all that, what straight guy walks out into the public and says to himself "im definitely straight, look at all these girls"...i know my straight friends are comfortable enough with their sexuality that they dont need to reassure themselves they are straight on multiple occasions.

 

My friend and his brother go to church everyday, they are very religious. The catch tho is that this friends brother is not homophobic. He doesn't agree with gays but he has no homophobic behavior at all like the brother in this post does. The difference is black and white. My friends off the charts homophobia sure makes it seem like his way of "turning himself straight". Christ he's not even comfortable giving me a hug anymore. It's sad

 

It's definitely over the top. Every single one of my straight friends would laugh it they walked in on me naked. It's so not a big deal. But it is for someone who's overly homophobic and insecure I guess.

 

I have an update if anyone is interested. We've hung out quite a bit since i posted and hes been trying to get closer with me physically. Im still keeping things at a minimum so he doesnt lead me onto anything though. The other day we sat down at a restaurant table, I was sitting next to the window and he was sitting to the right of me. His brother and brothers gf were sitting across from us. There was a few feet of space between my friend and I but I noticed he would keep inching himself closer to me. He adjusted his chair 5 times during a span of 5 minutes in order to be closer to me. The 5th time he inched closer to me he looked me dead in the eyes with a weird stare almost as if he was trying to tell me something but didn't wanna say anything out loud? So I gave in and moved as close to him as I could. I ended up brushing my right leg up against his left and we then had our legs glued to eachother for almost 10 minutes straight.

i hung out with him again last night and kind of kept my distance from him at first to see how he'd respond and I could tell he was a bit confused again. But both times we sat down at a table he sat on my side with me instead of with his brother. Anyways we left the park we were at and went to his brother's apartment. The 3 of them were laying in the brothers bed, I decided to change my shirt in front of them and when I took it off my friend kept peaking at my stomach and v line. Then I walked to the bathroom and he said "your ass looks bigger in those pants" (I bought new sweatpants). Then I joined them in the bed, my friend wanted to show me some video on his phone so I layed next to him and rested my head on his chest and he didn't move. That afterwards we watched a TV show and I layed my head across his thighs the whole time and he didn't care.

Here's where things get uglier for me tho....me and my friend left his brothers and went to my friends apartment for the night. He's laying in his bed, I'm laying on the air mattress next to his bed. He decided to bring up the fact that the first week he moved into this apartment he had a girl over and hasn't had one over since. He said they didn't have intercourse but did other stuff. So I asked him what they did and he was hesitant to tell me at first but said she fingered his ass while she sucked him off and he said it felt very good to him. He enjoyed it a lot. But then he said "I googled it because i was worried and I guess lots of straight guys enjoy it". Then he mentioned how he hasn't cum in 12 days and I thought he was going to maybe say he wanted to get off but he said he wants to stop masterbating and wait until marriage before he cums again which is absurd!! Because he's only 19 and single. I then told him about the gay experiences I've had and made it clear to him how good I am at sucking dick. He stayed silent and we went to sleep

 

Then the following day we went to Kalahari water park and I lost count on the amount of times he was checking out my happy trail and v-line. We went into one of the pools and played water basketball and were jumping all over eachothers wet bodies. It felt pretty good lol