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The manager wants me out

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Shane is tired, Jun 1, 2023.

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  1. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    I do not know where to post this online, I cannot talk about it to people in real life
    Manager is stirring issues between employees. Every time one of us talk to her she would say "well your coworker "insert name" said this and that"

    She caused more issues at work than fixing them. She thrives when employees are fighting among themselves.

    Lately she started to target me

    A client stood in the middle of the room and said amazing things about me to her. She came later and mocked my client in front of my coworkers like why would they say good things about me and how much they looked pathetic and they should have shut their mouth and went home.

    After she mocked my client in front of my coworkers she sent me an email FYI do not drink soda at the work place. She saw a soda and assumed its mine.

    She never acknowledge anything that I do or give. I give so much, I am the only one who stocks the place, make sure everything is set for the next day, I am the first to show up and last to leave, she sees all that and she never said that I did anything right. I treat my clients right, I mean why would I show up to work to fight with them? 99% of them said that they had a good experince with me. I even tried today to give them evaluation cards to see what would they say and gave me good evaluations. One went as far as buying me donuts and coffee.



    I deal with ten clients a day and only two complained about me since I started working for a year because they just did not like me as a person. It happens and thats fine I let them take their anger on me and still did not abuse them back.

    She asked me to chat with her and read absolute lies about me that were said by "a client", after I said my side of the story she said well thats not what they think, who was there as a witness I want to know what other complaints they said about you so I can report it as a risk to the management.

    I let things out of my system and told her how weird she is acting why she never acknowledges anything and now she does not even see my side of the story.

    She said well does that mean you are going to leave?

    I said no.

    She said that she is frustrated by my answer and she wants me to leave her office.
     
    #1 Shane is tired, Jun 1, 2023
  2. Wanderlost

    Wanderlost
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    It sounds like her boss made a mistake in hiring/promoting her to her position. I don't think I would stay where I'm not wanted, but I understand if you feel trapped in your current position. Maybe start submitting resumes to other jobs and see how things go. From what I am understanding about American jobs, there is unlikely to be a system of checks and balances that would hold your supervisor accountable, which is unfortunate.
     
    #2 Wanderlost, Jun 1, 2023
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  3. silverhalo

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    Hey I’m sorry you are going through this. Firstly are there any co workers you can talk to about this, as in do you know if other people feel the same way? If they do it is probably easier to try and take action as a group. Otherwise is it possible for you to move to a different company? Not ideal but it depends on the options to resolve the current situation.
     
    #3 silverhalo, Jun 2, 2023
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  4. Chip

    Chip
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    You are in an extremely toxic workplace. Honestly, I'd start looking for another position. It is unlikely a manager who is that unprofessional and incompetent is going to change.
     
    #4 Chip, Jun 2, 2023
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  5. Aeolia

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    some managers are only here to watch the world burn.

    unless there is a high likelihood of your manager being moved elsewhere or fired, I think you should look for a job elsewhere.though, I don't know about your living conditions and about how doable that is.
    it's sad to say, but a toxic manager will often get what they want. if she wants you to leave, then perhaps stop doing so much and act your wage, if it doesn't do anything at least you won't be as tired.
     
    #5 Aeolia, Jun 2, 2023
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  6. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    I stopped giving so much. I never stock. Only when I need it during my shift. I told them I wont give so much if I am not getting anything in return. Now coworkers are stocking and doing their part instead of waiting for me. I still do my job right but no more than that. They asked me to come early to help and I said NO. I woke up one day sick and I called out I put my health before this job now. It was actually what I needed to realize that I need to be self employed. I keep failing to be self employed but honestly the only person in world who deserves my efforts and dedication is myself. I applied for jobs and got rejected. I do not want to move again for work. I am tired and this shitty job showed me that working for someone else will keep ruining my health, my mental health, my finances and security. I am tired of putting my life in someone else hands like this. I only trust myself. I really want for once to succeed at self employment tired of failing.
     
    #6 Shane is tired, Jul 4, 2023
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  7. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    The manager apparently told my coworkers that they are allowed to leave early when I am the one working late. I end up doing 3 and 4 people work cause coworkers are allowed to leave before the end of the shift. I sent an email trolling saying since I am disrespected while I still do 3 and 4 people work I request a raise lmao.
     
    #7 Shane is tired, Jul 11, 2023
  8. Chip

    Chip
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    Find another job immediately. The environment you are in is toxic. It is not going to change.
     
    #8 Chip, Jul 12, 2023
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  9. Mirko

    Mirko
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    Reading through your thread, I can only encourage you to start looking for another job and leave your current job as soon as you are able to. Even with a higher salary, your working conditions might not change. As Chip mentioned, it's a toxic work environment, an environment that is best avoided.

    While easier said than done, it's important to place your mental health, well being before this particular workplace.

    If you can, take some time to further explore your options and perhaps try to connect with other local employers.
     
    #9 Mirko, Jul 12, 2023
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  10. Tightrope

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    I forgot to reply when I had meant to.

    If you are still at that employer, keep a log or diary of what is happening. If it's in e-mails or texts, see if you can get images of them. Do it so you don't get in trouble. I have no idea if an IT system knows that screenshots are being taken and of what. Do everything - the logs, images - in a way that isn't seen so that it stays with you and off the employer's premises.

    The same goes with digital cameras. Digital cameras can be your friend. I was once in a very toxic environment, and I didn't use my camera for an object and situation that could have very easily been photographed. You can't be photographing people, so be careful. Work environments are all a little toxic, aren't they? When I left for another job and they could only use someone working under me and not qualified to do the work, they lost a bundle of money and the man who was my boss got fired. He just liked going to meetings, socializing, and doing lunch. He didn't like the more mundane work and that's where he got burned. Karma is a bitch.

    I hope you get where you need to be and keep and improve your mental health during such a trying ordeal.
     
    #10 Tightrope, Jul 12, 2023
  11. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    The only options that I might have will require me to travel across the country again. I already traveled a lot and I just moved across the country for this job. I am tired. I hate it here.
     
    #11 Shane is tired, Jul 13, 2023
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  12. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    Thanks all for the advice
     
    #12 Shane is tired, Jul 13, 2023
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  13. Tightrope

    Tightrope
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    I hit "like" because I feel for you. I moved several states over once for something that was not worth it at all. Stable company - terrible position. Or at least one not suited for me and there were some I may have liked, but it would have taken too long to work all the angles and get one of those positions. They were not at all glamorous positions, but more suited to how I like to work and where my aptitudes were at the time. The department I was in was not happy that I was looking at other areas (still within the company) and I could sense some friction.

    It is very tiring and keeps wearing you down as you keep trying to fake it and do what you're supposed to do.

    Leaving to do something else somewhere else was like a ton of bricks coming off my shoulders.
     
    #13 Tightrope, Jul 13, 2023
  14. Mirko

    Mirko
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    Hi there, I couldn't help but wonder, how do you feel about potentially needing to relocate?

    While experiences such as the one you are going through can of course bring out deeper emotions, disappointments, have you had a chance to do sone research on other potential employers in the area that you are currently in?

    Would there be other jobs that interest you, and you could do, using your transferable skills, if by chance you feel that a move wouldn't be in the cards at the moment?
     
    #14 Mirko, Jul 13, 2023
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  15. Tightrope

    Tightrope
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    @Mirko

    Yes, the staying or leaving the area question is a very relevant one. It's also expensive and tiring. If someone likes where they're now living, they could look around and see what transferable skills can be used. It's always a weighing game.
     
    #15 Tightrope, Jul 14, 2023
  16. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    She is obsessed with me she sent a modified dress code basically labeling my style as not allowed and today came to my area and said loudly that anyone who dress up like that she will fire them.
    HR is refusing to email me back about harassments and the director is refusing to address my concerns for harassments.
     
    #16 Shane is tired, Jul 14, 2023
  17. Mirko

    Mirko
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    You have provided some more reasons as to why you need to think about whether this is a place where you want to continue working.

    The more you reveal as to what's happening in your work place, the more red flags are going up.

    You are in a TOXIC environment. The longer you continue being in that environment, the more your mental health, well being could or will be impacted. This in turn could influence how successful you are going to be in finding other employment.

    As hard as this is, you need to place yourself first and start looking for other work and leave as soon as possible.
     
    #17 Mirko, Jul 14, 2023
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  18. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    I cannot go to this job anymore. I called out today.
     
    #18 Shane is tired, Jul 24, 2023
  19. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    I wanted to let you guys know that I just sent my resignation letter to HR director and the manager's boss. I wrote everything that happened to me as well as sent it to my personal email as an evidence. Thank you all for helping me realize that I must go. Even though I left I still feel anger, sadness and depression they did mess me up mentally but I will get better. The past few months I was in very dark place smoking over a half pack of cigarettes in my break and not eating I believe if I did not leave now that job would have killed me
     
    #19 Shane is tired, Aug 6, 2023
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  20. Shane is tired

    Shane is tired
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    So HR called me and left a voice message saying that the manager called them complaining about me "not showing up to work" they asked are you resigning? Like seriously are they playing dumb!
     
    #20 Shane is tired, Aug 8, 2023
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