I'm starting to feel like I'm losing all traces of my former self- the straight person I've been most of my adult life. I had gay sensations early on in my growing up- but like many here I suppressed them. At 49 now I am undergoing a huge change in life- My gay change of life i call it. I began having intense fantasies about men just over 5 years ago. They just started coming on. I resisted but then started embracing them because they felt so good. I got into gay porn heavily, then social media talking to guys more and more. That led 3 weeks ago to sleeping with a guy here in my hometown. It was both incredible and shocking at once. Now i find myself thinking of men 24/7, of flirting with them in real life, and of even dressing fem for them- something I never thought I'd want to do! It's all happening fast now and I'm starting to forget I ever was straight.
Scott, I don’t think what you are experiencing is all that usual. Many of us have repressed our homosexuality for so long that once the genie is out of the bottle there is no putting him back. We start to embrace our homosexuality with a vengeance as it provides incredible liberation from our heterosexual past. We want to experience all our gay nature has to offer now that we are free. For me it almost seems like I was never straight as I am gayer ( whatever that means) as time goes on. I love every aspects of my gay nature and now I identify totally as gay. I never even mention I was “ heterosexual “ once. Only gay feels right. You are heading in the right direction my friend. Embrace your new found true sexuality.
I don't feel like I am losing all traces of who I was, but figuring out who I've always been. I don't necessarily feel like I've repressed my sexuality over my 48 years, but my control freak side did everything he could to restrain it. But that just be semantics.
Scott. I went through the same thing. Can I tell you that as a life long pantyhose wearer once I felt l
...not sure why my reply was cut off but Scott. Once I dropped my guilt and repression for wearing pantyhose and discovering many who did the same it affected my sexuality in that I was no longer repressing that as well. You are normal in my books! Never feel bad about what you are going through. Embrace it. Being attracted or loving another man is a wonderful thing.
When I had my first gay sexual experience, I couldn't stop thinking about men and only men either (even as a bisexual). That lasted for quite a while and now has seemed to balance out. I probably think about women somewhat more often, but there are times where I'm thinking about men and only men 24/7, hehe.
[QUOTE="ScottG, post: 6753996, member: 11081] Now i find myself thinking of men 24/7, of flirting with them in real life, and of even dressing fem for them- something I never thought I'd want to do! It's all happening fast now and I'm starting to forget I ever was straight.[/QUOTE] This is one of the advantages of finally embracing your homosexuality. With the static of phony heterosexuality gone you are able to open your eyes to your true sexual self. You free yourself to look at men as emotional and sexual partners exclusively. The straight begins to finally fade away. For me I am almost embarrassed to admit I was ever part of it as I am “so” gay these days. Gay life is much more exciting and fulfilling on every level.
Don't think of it as your former self, just think that you found who you really are and have been all along. My first real relationships were with guys. But for years I suppressed that & tried to think of myself as straight. But when I came out to my wife a number of years ago I was able to finally open up to myself and express my sexuality for the first time.
Hi scott Losing your former self is all part of acceptance as for suppressing those feeling I have all my life from a teenager up until I was 48 when my homosexuality started to rear its head I fought hard against it for a good few years and then I came on this site and never looked bck Fantasies porn all part of the processes Of expecting who you are . And as for thinking of men 24/7 that was also the same for me and most gay men on here and if you want to dress fem to impress you go for it do what makes you feel good if it helps you accept your homosexuality Good luck
