Were you ever told that you were "mature for your age" but wish you weren't?

While growing up, I was told the opposite. That I looked to have fun and laugh. I suppose I could be serious enough to get the job done.

 

I was only told by my aunt that when I was a teen. I remember being in high school and overhearing conversations from other girls talking about screaming and throwing tantrums and it really made me think about what she said . As I'm getting older, I feel I'm actually becoming more immature. I lose my patience with people and people things more. It didn't use to be like that.

 

Sorry, I meant to say "people and things" not "people and people."

 

Yes, but on the same theme as others have said…a sibling had died a year before I was born. I was born to a house full of still grieving people, which basically meant I was trying to be as low maintenance and low visibility as possible from a really young age. I don’t think it was that I was an “old soul”. I think I had to grow up fast. That and there was never a sense of innocence or joy there. And that’s before talking about the soul sucking churches we went to when I was a kid.

 

Not to toot my own horn, but I was a "pleasure to have in class", "mature for my age"....you name it. As you and others have said, I think it has a lot to do with mental illness, the closet, trauma, and getting responsibilities not really meant for a child (whether it was an actually physical responsibility, or just an adult off loading adult worries and issues onto a kid)

Yuppp. I really had a delayed adolescence and did a lot of "teen" exploration stuff in my 20s. Some of the "tame risks" I took in my 20s, people are still surprised I've ever done it lol.

 

Yes, I was always considered mature for my age and my interests in life have typically been on a more mature level. It's not that I take life very seriously, but I've always been attuned to the seriousness of life and that's kind of led me on a different curve, at times. In many ways that mature outlook has protected me when dealing with big life issues and problems.

 

I'm pretty mature for my age...most of the time. There are times when I enjoy letting my 'inner kid' out. You're only young once.

 

Unfortunately, I was in a similar situation as you. I am a AFAB trans male. I have two amazing brothers and out of us three, my parents would say "you're the female, the responsible, mature one." Some days I took it in stride and enjoyed the title of the "mature kid". Other days I would wallow in doubt and anxiety because of the pressure my parents put on me. As I got older, adults would call me disrespectful because I acted way older than my age, trying to be on par with the adults. I was doing what I was taught, be mature and act like an adult. Sadly many parents do this unconsciously, some consciously. All I could do was re learn and endure the never ending punishments and insults, and things and friends being taken away from me by my parents. Surprisingly this still happens to me to this day. But hey, what can I do, right?

 

Yeah, since age 8 I were taller than adults making it difficult to find friends of appropriate age and causing mockeries among peers since I were taller and looked 20+ when I were 8 so making any mistakes were met with “you should be more knowledgeable/mature...”

 

Yes haha I think since I was first really aware of my own existence, I was aware that people around me felt I was very "mature".

I think its partially due to being ND in a time where that was something parents were ashamed of, as well as sexual trauma from a very young age.

I remember my sister (3 yrs older than me) would get reprimanded less and were more gentle with her emotionally. My dad explained to me

 

It was the other way around for me.

I always seemed immature for my age, as a teenager and into adulthood. Even when I was being more responsible and accountable than my peers I just seemed kid like. At least from what I can tell.

 

I am the oldest of a group of 7 cousins. My mum’s three kids and my aunts four kids. We currently range in age from 30 (me) to 18(youngest cousin). I always had to be the most mature one, the good example. I hated that when they got to whatever age I had been they weren’t held to the same standards. I do view the 18yr old as being young and immature even though I felt the opposite at that age. Even though we only saw our cousins a couple of times a year I was still the oldest of a three kids and I had to be the more mature one always. But I was a quiet kid, my hobby was reading and I usually had my nose stuck in a book. All these later and the only difference is a kindle instead of a book.