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Do you think my father is a homosexual?

Discussion in 'LGBT Later in Life' started by I am straight, Aug 17, 2021.

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  1. out2019

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    Still no indicator that he's gay - I forgot to ask how old he was. Again men can find other men attractive, even beautiful, but in a platonic way, just like people can find children beautiful, or horses- it doesn't make it sexual. Especially if he is for whatever reason not interested in sex.

    As I mentioned, some people are just very private about sex, especially around their own children. How well do you know your father? Is he emotionally withdrawn ?

    Ok, you can set your sexual orientation in settings though :slight_smile:

    But he is married to a woman. Obviously at one time he had sex. As I mentioned, I have heard of couples that sleep apart when they are older because of health or sleep problems -it was very common for women and men to sleep apart a century ago. Have you ever asked why?

    You're never going to know what's inside his head, and no one here knows him so I guess I don't see the point.
     
  2. I am straight

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    My father is 72 years old.

    I understand that men can find horses and other animals beautiful, etc. My dad implied that the boxers being so slim IS A BENEFIT to attending the boxing matches.

    Yes, my parents had sex at least three times. That does not disprove that he is gay. I have been scolded for using the word that starts with h. So i will say that plenty of gay, non-bisexual men have biological children. I think that my dad just imagined that my mom is a man when he conceived me and my sisters.



    My parents have slept in separate bedrooms for as long as i can remember. When i was about 12 or 13 years old (over a quarter of a century ago), my mom once complained about how my dad was not interested in her sexually. She didn't use the exact words "you are not interested in me sexually", but she said something to that effect. Then she did say the exact words "we don't even sleep in the same bed." My dad laughed and said "sorry" with a smile on his face.
     
  3. out2019

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    Yes, and plenty of them are here on EC. I don't have kids but I did have sex with women for years before I accepted myself. So I am not disagreeing but again its not proof he's gay.
    I doubt your parents just had sex three times for three kids btw.

    Right, but not interested in sex with women does not make someone gay.

    They sleep in separate rooms but you don't know why- and it sounds like it's between them.

    I am not saying it's impossible that your dad is gay, but I am just saying other reasons exist for the things you're observing and there is no clear evidence one way or the other. He doesn't seem to want to share the issue, so again I don't see the point :slight_smile:
     
    #23 out2019, Aug 18, 2021
    Last edited: Aug 18, 2021
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  4. QuietPeace

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    I for one would have found that as offensive as if you had chosen the username "No Homo", heterosexuals never have to be in the closet because no one has ever been the subject to hate crimes specifically because they are "normal" (heterosexual, white, neurotypical, etc).

    I know that you are not outing him here. I just get the feeling that you are so invested in finding out someone else's sexuality and I cannot figure out why that would be so necessary if it did not have to do with confronting that person in some way about it (I know that this is my own problem).
    As far as the first part here, there is also the fact that even lesbians watch gay male porn so that him watching something (whether simply erotica or other type show or actual porn) that has nude men does not necessarily prove that he is not straight.

    I am attracted to people across the scale. My second wife was definitely attracted to men and possibly somewhat to women though very definitely closeted about it (and she never accepted me as female). Once we had had several children and we had decided that we would have no more children and I was sterilized we never had sex again. This did not make either one of use gay. Another thing to note is the fact that never in my life have I discussed my sexuality with my children, nor did my parents discuss theirs with me. (I am younger than your dad and my parents are older so our generations bracket your fathers)

    As I mentioned above, and I know that this is my own issue. I cannot see why you would be so invested in someone else's sexuality without it being about trying to get them to come out or something.

    I have a friend (I really do this is not secretly about me and my family), she grew up in a home with three bedrooms. At first her parents were in one bedroom, her oldest sister in one and she shared a bedroom with her other sister. When her oldest sister went to college instead of the two sisters getting their own bedrooms their mom moved into the third bedroom and her parents slept apart the remainder of her mothers life. This does not make either one of them gay, it just was better for her parents sleep.

    As mentioned before, many couples sleep apart for many different reasons. My parents got separate bedrooms when they were older, my mother had breathing problems and needed a machine to breathe (she had emphysema). In my own marriage my husband sometimes just needs time to himself and spends a night sleeping alone. Sleeping apart only proves that the people need to sleep apart and proves nothing about their sexuality.
     
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  5. quebec

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    I am straight..... For what it's worth, you can change your user id. It will have to be checked to see if what you choose is not already in use as well as a few other requirements. Make a post in the "Ask the Staff" Sub-forum and we can get to work on it! :old_smile:
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
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  6. Chip

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    It seems like this thread has pretty much served it's purpose. Closing to further responses.
     
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