Howdy, lately I have been having strong feelings towards guys. Ever since I was 13 I had subtle to no attraction towards dudes, and then one day I start finding a bunch of guys cute. This has been going on for about two weeks now and they won't go away. I still like women, but I just have alot of questions.
Welcome to EC. It is pretty normal among bisexuals to have a kind of "mood swing" where they vary from being more attracted to one and then to another gender. It does not mean that their orientation is changing. It is a lot like sometimes wanting vanilla ice cream and at others wanting chocolate. What are your questions?
Peoples orientations do not go away. If you actually are bi and attracted to both men and women then that is the way that you are. Throughout your life you might notice minor changes in preferences and such but orientation does not really change.
It depends on the person. Some people are mostly attracted to men and only find a few women attractive. I myself prefer women and can find a lot of them attractive while I find very few men attractive (my husband is on the list of ones that I find attractive).
Just because you have an attraction to men or women, doesn’t make them all attractive, so yes, I think it’s normal. Personally I think I might like just 1 or 2 guys from a group of men.
I would wait until you're 100% sure you're bisexual, accept it, and embrace it before coming out to your family.
Do you have any idea how accepting they will be? If coming out could put you in danger, etc. then I would hold off.
Im one of the luckier LGBT members, I have a nice supporting stable family, my uncle is even gay. I just worry about my father though, he loves me to death and I assume he supports the LGBT community, but I don't know how He'll react to his eldest son liking guys. He has also been listening to a lot of NPR and is a conservative, so that's not a plus.
The best time to come out really depends on the person and the family. I would say that you should not come out if it would put you in any danger. Not just danger of being kicked out and being homeless but also danger of ridicule, gaslighting (like being told "it is just a phase") or other such problems. How does your family talk about LGBT+ people in general and about your uncle specifically? I do not think that listening to NPR is an issue it is much more neutral, listening to Fox "news" or some alt right source would be more of an indicator of issues I think.
My uncle is a very loved and respected member of the family, we even consider his Bf to be family too. My family has get togethers all the time, infact we're having one today.
Then there should be no problem in coming out. Any time that would not be perceived as taking away from someone else should be fine (so do not come out in the middle of someone else's birthday or other celebration like a wedding etc).
Th Welcome to my world. I have been going through this for the past three years and it’s been tough. Especially since am not single and my partner is a woman. But your situation could be easier than mine because from what you are saying, you have a supportive and open minded family. I don’t unfortunately. Not only that my whole environment and social circles where I live are not accepting but they are bigoted and homophobic as well. I think it’s up to you. You can choose to act on your attractions or not. Either way I don’t think you are gonna face a lot of difficulties. having said that I agree with @BiBoyToy so don’t come out until you are like 90% sure. Because attractions alone are not a very reliable measure or indication of sexual orientation. A lot of of people may have a fleeting attraction to specific people . But that does not mean they are bi.
I disagree. Orientation is all about who you are attracted to. In your original post you spoke of finding men attractive, you also have mentioned being attracted to women. This pretty much equates to being Bi.
