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I joined hoping to find someone to talk to

Discussion in 'The Welcome Lounge' started by Dilettante, Oct 29, 2020.

  1. Dilettante

    Regular Member

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    Hey Everyone!

    I'm just a new member here and I found this site by looking up which communities offer support to individuals who are still not sure of their orientation. To be honest, I am really confused now. I came from a Catholic family and definitely is "strict" when it comes to relationships (ol' heterosexual relationships). My parents are quite acquainted now because they watch western shows where LGBTQ+ relationships are involved but I can see that they are still hesitant in accepting these kind of relationships. I was enrolled in an all-girls primary school and probably because of that I had a few girl crush here and there. I attempted to court one but I was too shy to follow through. When I went to college, I met guys and I am attracted to some of them but I did not have any relationships with them throughout my stay at the university.

    Right now, I more of attracted to girls. So I am really confused if I am bisexual or lesbian. Do you know how you labeled yourself? And my biggest question is, how do I come out? It's really terrifying for me coming from a conservative Catholic family.

    Thanks for those who will respond.
     
  2. BiGemini87

    Advisor Full Member

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    Hello, Dilettante, and welcome to EC. :slight_smile:

    I think figuring out what label you align with is something that's going to take a bit more time and self-examination. There's no rush to put a label on yourself right away (or at all). Be patient with yourself, try not to be embarrassed or ashamed of your feelings, and be honest with yourself over what you feel around the same and the opposite sex.

    I think, given enough time, you'll figure it out. But if you ever need to talk, I'm happy to listen. :slight_smile: I myself am bisexual, and it took me a long, long time--both to realize it and to accept it. As for coming out, please only do so if you aren't in danger of being kicked out or abused by your parents. If the need to come out is overpowering, try ensuring you have something to fall back on should the worst happen; like somewhere safe to stay, or someone you can call if there's trouble of any kind.
     
  3. Lucy Marie

    Regular Member

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    Welcome. You have found a place that is all accepting and loving. As said above no need to rush into labeling yourself yet. Take your time, you are worth the time! You are worth the time and love. Truly, ((momhugs)).
    Confusion is a normal human state. So many things we just go around about. I am NOT minimizing this change I am just saying this, confusion about who we are, is all normal. Also, please understand sexuality is fluid. You may find an answer for now, but you might want to change it down the road (and you can!)
    I also agree, please make sure you are in a safe place. This place is especially safe, but make sure you are safe physically as well.
    Talk to others here. Look around. Do not rush your journey.
    I am happy to chart with you, but I fall into Mama Bear not personal experience. There are many who will be able to walk with you on that path.
    Also, there is a thread here about Pope Francis changing Catholic doctrine. I pray that is beneficial for you.
    When you need a shoulder to cry or arms to cheer or hands to clap—I am there. I also will help with your heart.
    Welcome, ((momhugs))
     
  4. Dilettante

    Regular Member

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    Thank you so much for the both of you. I really appreciate the warm welcome. I did see the post about Pope Francis accepting gay civil unions. I'm really shy that's why I joined this virtual community trying to connect with other people who is on the same journey as me. I know my parents love me but I think there will always be the fear of them rejecting me or ignoring me if I tell them what I feel. For now I am thinking of talking about it with my sister who might accept me more. There's always that nagging feeling that what I feel goes against what I was raised in. It's frustrating but thank you for telling me it's okay. I'm taking baby steps in discovering more about this side of me. Appreciate the love. :heart:
     
  5. LostInDaydreams

    Moderator Full Member

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    Hi @Dilettante and welcome to EC. :slight_smile:

    I hope you find the support you’re looking for here.
     
  6. Dilettante

    Regular Member

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    :pray:
    Thank you @LostInDaydreams, looking forward to meet new people. :relaxed:
     
  7. Mirko

    Admin Team Advisor Full Member

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    Hi there and welcome to the community! You'll likely find that EC is a great resource to find answers to labels, gaining an understanding of moving forward, coming out and being generally comfortable with yourself.

    Glad you have decided to join. :slight_smile:
     
  8. Dilettante

    Regular Member

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    Hey @Mirko thanks for the warm welcome. I’ll be checking forums for references. I’m really glad I joined. I wanted to make friends too from around the world. Glad I found this. ❤️