i made a thread similar to this a little while ago, but i wanted to make another as im just confused in general now... i had very comfortably been calling myself a trans guy for a little while and my anxiety has sorta knocked me down a little and now im completely confused on who i am, all i know is im not comfortable being female, it doesnt help that i feel like im not dysphoric enough though (especially compared to my boyfriend, who is also trans), it doesnt affect me too much (though i rather have a male body)..i just feel very lost on who i am at this point, while i know doubts are very normal i cant help but feel like theres something wrong with me i would like to speak to some kind of online therapist but i dont have the money for it, and i have to keep it private as my mother wont accept me if i were to come out as trans.. is it normal for dysphoria to vary from person to person?
It's very normal. There is really no such thing as "dysphoric enough". There is no minimum or maximum amount of dysphoria required to be trans. I personally have very little problem with my male body, but I do think of myself as female and wish I had a women's body.
Like most issues, dysphoria definitely varies from person to person. Some trans people have such strong issues that they take to self-harm or self-mutilation, whereas some people don't really do anything at all to their bodies and are fine just changing their pronouns.
Heey, - So when I questioned if I truly am ftm it was mainly out of embarrasment and shame. Maybe that could be the case. Your boyfriend might be more confident being trans so that's making you step back? You know the answer to that the best. You souldn't compare timeline of your transitions and confidence if that's the case. * Looking back on childhood and finding little indications of me being trans kept me on track. * Dysphoria can vary with trans/non binary people, plus you can have good and bad days. Also, some people in general can confuse dysphoria with dysmorphia, or others actually fakely lower dysphoria by ignoring it. So as you can see it's all ups and downs. Trust your instinct, don't overthink too much. No matter the outcome, give yourself compassion, promise to love yourself no matter what you identify as later on because no identity is bad or "dumb". Accepting and loving yourself as a being is very important. Hope it feels better, clarified soon
I'm pretty new to all of this, and I can only speak for myself - but as someone who thinks they might be MTF and is in the very early stages of figuring it out (been questioning since June), so far I've experienced no dysphoria or dysmorphia at all. It's very confusing, frustrating and oddly enough a little embarrassing - but the fact of the matter is that there's something going on. Who knows? Maybe we're not trans, but there is at the very least more to our true selves than we currently understand, and that deserves to be explored. For what its worth, seeing your post made me feel better just by virtue of knowing that I am not alone - in that same respect I hope this reply makes you feel better too, even if its just a little bit.
There are people who identify as trans despite having little to no dysphoria at all. It´s not the amount of dysphoria that makes you trans; it's just a matter of identifying as a different gender than the one you were assigned at birth.
