Hi. I'm new here. So let me just say that I'm bisexual (I've never told anyone that). I'm 50 years old and married. I have always known that I am bisexual. I have always been sexually attracted to both men and women. I have wanted to come out for a long time, but being from a very conservative area knew that I couldn't. The other night though my wife confided in me that she is bisexual ( though like me has never acted on her feelings) and has always been sexually attracted to both sexes. We are both very open minded, so this didn't bother me, and she knew it wouldn't. She then asked me if I had ever reflected on my sexuality. She gave me the perfect opportunity to come out and I didn't. And I really want to, but don't know how to go back and do it. Any advice would be helpful.
Hey, there! I think there's no right or wrong way, as long as you're safe and ready. Perhaps sit down with your wife and start off with something like, "You know how you told me you're bisexual? Well..." You can explain that maybe her confiding it to you caught you off-guard, or that you didn't know how to confide the same when she did. I'm not sure what thoughts or feelings you had when she told you, but whatever they were, I'm sure she'll understand. Undoubtedly those feelings or thoughts have crossed her mind before too, and maybe contributed to her never coming out or acting on her attractions before.
Thank you for the very insightful advice. I've been trying to figure itout, but every time I want to say something I get scared.
I took your advice and talked with my wife. It was very releasing, and she was totally accepting and it was no big deal. She said she was happy that I was able to come out to her. I'm 50 years old, and she is the first person I've ever come out to. I'm feeling very euphoric.
That's wonderful! I'm so glad you were able to do it--both of you, in fact. It's never too late, right?
