Corrupt A Wish

Granted: complete and total memory loss of everything that happened before you woke up this morning.

I wish my students would practice their instruments over the holiday.

(btw: ironically, all of my mouth pieces except for two of them were new to me but had previous owners)

 

Granted, every day all of your students rally right under your window and practice all day with all their might. At the same time.

I wish my crush shared my feelings for her.

 

You’re supposed to corrupt the wish! lol

Granted, but it’s only because she can’t remember your name.

I wish for pizza.

 

My apologies then, I didnt know you'd actually enjoy that xd

So how about this: Your students do indeed practice everyday and become extremely good. You want to enjoy their performance, but as soon as you hear the first tune, your eardrums explode. Literally. Now you're deaf for life.

 

Sure, but it's made with blood instead of tomato sauce, topped with vegan cheese, and green peas

 

I wish for a book that knows exactly what I need to read atm, and will supply it.

 

Granted, but it's written in a language you don't know.

I wish for a lifetime supply of mountain dew

 

Granted, but the supplies had been already expired by a year.

I want a cat so bad

 

Granted, but you only get to spend just under 3 years with the cat. You must say goodbye to it because of the actions of dogs.

I wish that I could remain stable in my bipolar

 

Granted, but you're no longer physically stable and lose your balance.

I wish I could sing better

 

Granted, but you turn into a bird everytime you sing.

I wish I stop being the greatest procrastinator.

 

Okey doke, but you drive yourself to the point of exhaustion and don't stop working until you collapse.

I wish I could teleport.

 

Okay, but it's not very accurate; you'll appear somewhere within 3 meters of where you intended.

I wish I would stop hitting the M key when I wanted a comma...

 

All right, but you'll hit the comma when you want an M.

I wish the whole COVID-19 thing was over.

 

mkay, but the vaccines are super expensive and the needles are long as hell.

I wish my dog would stop dropping her toy on the floor and barking at me until I get it for her.

 

Granted, but now you can't get your favorite toy unless your dog gets it for you.


I wish it weren't already 100°F outside

 

Granted you now live in the North Pole. Take care of the penguins.

I wish I could get the chance to kiss my boyfriend

 

Granted but it's done so quick that you don't remember a thing.

I want to have the chocolate cheesecake I had as a kid from a local bakery, it's gone now....

 

Granted but it tastes terrible, they must have used salt instead of sugar.

I wish I was good at painting.

 

Granted but the price of paint spikes and it’s 99999$ per pint per color.

I wish Red Bull would finally give me wings