I am about ready to scream. I'm turning thirty a week from today, and my mother is ordering me to give her my phone and go take a nap because I'm too cranky for her liking. She has also, apparently, behind my back called a doctor that isn't my GP to make an appointment for drugs because I'm too moody. I cannot express how fed up I am with being infantilized and micromanaged in every single aspect of my life.
I hear you. My mother is the quintessence of the Freudian overbearing mother. She asks me if I have a hckey everytime I get a rash shaving, complains about the color of underwear I wear, and pretty much acts like I'm her husband and not her son. She complains everytime I wear something that she doesn't find attractive on a man. At least your mom believes in medicine, mine literally thinks coconut oil is magic and cures everything. She gas lights me by telling me I'm crazy when I buy products to reverse hairless, and then in the same breath tells me to use coconut oil to cure balding. Everytime I get meds prescribed to me, she tells me they make me crazy and I need to drop them. I wish my mom infantilized me, but instead she constantly calls me retarded, screams at the highest pitch possible, and throws out clothes I buy and dresses me in what she thinks is "sexy." There comes a point when you just have to realize whatever you used to have with your mother is dead, and will never come back. Your mother will constantly be trying to infantilize you as a means of retaining her youth, just as my mom constantly tries to use me to retain her marriage to my deceased father.
I appreciate your response. My mother does sound like the exact opposite. She doesn't allow massage because it's too sexual, or yoga because it's sacrilegious. It's pretty much pills or bust. I never really had a good relationship with my mother to begin with. It's been tenuous from the get-go. And since I can't leave, it's not getting any better. I'm truly sorry to hear of the struggles you have with your family. I hope you have some other kind of support system that you can lean on. That sounds terribly difficult to live with.
"Infantilze you as a means of retaining her youth." Wow. That concept had never occurred to me. Thank you for saying that.
