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Worried about online friend

Discussion in 'General Support and Advice' started by Joe2001, Mar 4, 2020.

  1. Joe2001

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    Hi all.

    I've made some threads about this person in the past, but I'm a bit worried about him at the moment. We normally message once a week. He usually responds quickly, or at least within a day.

    This time, however, he hasn't responded. Sent him a message on Sunday and still no reply, but to make things worse, my messages have been sent but not delivered, indicating that he hasn't been online at all. Hadn't heard of anything that would cause him to be offline for so long.

    He has made threats of suicide in the past and has his share of problems and is also unusually dependent on parents despite living away from home and being nearly 20. To put it bluntly, based on all of that, I'm worried that something has happened to him. Sadly, it wouldn't surprise me.

    Am I right to be worried? Anything that I can do?
     
  2. Broccoli

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    Have you sent him any other messages since Sunday, or tried contacting him through another medium (phone/email)? I'm assuming he doesn't live anywhere near you but do you have contact details for any of his 'local' friends or family? Most likely there's an 'innocent' explanation but it's very natural to be concerned about a friend.
     
  3. Joe2001

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    I've sent him 2 messages since (one on Monday, one earlier today), same thing, sent but not delivered.

    Haven't got contact details for anyone close to him or any other way of direct contact to him.
     
    #3 Joe2001, Mar 4, 2020
    Last edited: Mar 4, 2020
  4. Joe2001

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    My messages now seem to be "delivered" (not seen yet) so I guess that is a positive sign.
     
    Destin likes this.
  5. Joe2001

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    Still nothing back. Almost a week now and he's not seen the messages let alone replied. It's not like him and usually he would mention if he would be away and unavailable.

    Given the threats of suicide that he's made before, I'm beginning to assume the worst. I've tried making searches for him online to see if anyone else has made posts but seen nothing.

    It could be that I've been blocked but I can't see why given that our most recent conversation went fine.
     
    #5 Joe2001, Mar 7, 2020
    Last edited: Mar 7, 2020
  6. Nightlight

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    I don't think you don't have to assume the absolute worst about him. Online connections come and go rapidly. Isn't it common for people to join a site one day, then delete the account or the posts they made, for the sake of their privacy, etc? If you're still worried, you can ask someone else on the site about him.

    This reminds me....I used to have an online friend years ago. We talked about our problems when we felt like it. I was grieving over someone special to me, and he was having problems with his past, resulting in his terrible mental illness. He kept talking how he would rather die than surviving on psychiatric treatments that do nothing for him. We shared problems that could not be shared between our friends or family, while keeping personal informations private.

    Eventually I moved on (partially) about my problem and didn't bother with the site. During the months of me being offline, he had given me a last goodbye and deactivated the account without a chance for me to say anything. To be very honest, I didn't trust him wholeheartedly as online connections can be dangerous, it still broke my heart. I don't know what happened to him. If the treatments were so bad that nothing didn't really work on him, he could've done anything. From suicide to anything more mundane. Even now I wish I'd know how he's doing.