Am I non-binary? Or do I just like dresses and heels?

So I kind of feel like an intruder here, since I'm not sure if there's really something going on with my gender, or if I'm just overthinking things like I often do (ya anxiety!). The main reason I'm posting here is that I've been told several times that if you think you might be trans or non binary you probably are, since cis people don't question their gender. Since I have been wondering about this stuff for awhile now, I figured I might as well post and see what others think. I'm basically just going to put out a bunch of stuff I've thought, felt, or done that's made me question over the years, and see if any of it sounds familiar to others, or if maybe I'm just overthinking things. This post will probably be kind of long and rambley, so sorry for that, and thanks to anyone who reads through it all. Also, I should probably note that I'm assigned male, just so you know what angle this will be coming from.
I'll start with the thing that first made me wonder about this, that's that I like dressing up in "women's" cloths. I like putting on skirts, dresses, high heals, makeup, nail polish, and stuff like that. I find it really fun to dress up very feminine from time to time. The "from time to time" thing is important though. I like seeing myself in those kind of cloths, but honestly, I don't think I'd want to dress like that all the time. For the most part I like dressing in masculine attire for most parts of my life. So it's not that I'd want to dress feminine all the time, more that I like to do it from time to time. For example I like the idea of doing drag, because I could dress up very fem for a bit, then take it all off and go back to my normal masculine cloths. There are a few exceptions to this. I really like painting my nails, and have been experimenting with wearing some makeup (mostly eyeline and eyeshadow) to various parties over the last couple of months. I also have a pair of high heeled boots that I love, and have been wearing pretty much every chance can get since I bought them. Doing this stuff makes me feel kind of hot, and I really like that.
I also sometimes get kind of jealous of women, mostly regarding cloths. Sometimes when I see a woman in a gregarious dress or really amazing heals I'll feel kind of jealous. I think it's because I know that I could probably not pull something like that off, not without a lot of work and body shaping stuff. I haven't noticed that feeling quite as much since I started dressing up more, and have gotten some body shaping stuff to help make feminine cloths fit when I wear them. But I still get the feeling from time to time. I have a number of queer female friends, and I often hear them talk about seeing a beautiful woman and being unsure if they want to be here or be with her, and honestly it's kind of like that. I'm often unsure if I want to be with the woman because she's so pretty, or weather I wish I could have whatever she's wearing, and have it fit me.
Before I go on, I do want to bring up a few things that have made me wonder if maybe this isn't a gender thing, and is maybe something else. First off, I find dressing up in femaine cloths very arousing. A lot of times I'll get dressed up, mess around a bit in those cloths, then masturbate before taking them off. this often makes me wonder if maybe this is just a fetish or kink or something, and not really anything to do with gender. I will note that I also get aroused when I wear masculine cloths that make me feel sexy, like a well fitted suit or something like that. So I kind of think it could just be that I get aroused by feeling hot? I'm most really sure. Another thing that makes me wonder if there is really something going on here is that I know gender and cloths aren't the same thing. A man doesn't become a woman because he puts on a skirt. So I'm aware that I could just be a cis guy who like to explore his feminine side. I guess I'm not really sure how to tell if my desire to try on dresses, heels, and such is part of some kind of gender expression, or if it might just be that I think those things are pretty and want to wear them regardless of my gender.
I think part of the answer to that last question though, might lie in some of the feelings I've noticed more recently since I've been thinking about this stuff. First off, I really hate when people refer to things in a gendered way. For example my mom likes to call hardware stores "man stores" and that really bothers me. It makes me feel one, like women shouldn't go there, which is bullshit, and two that if I'm a "man" I should like going there, and honestly I couldn't care less. I also really hate it when people say things about "that's just how men are" or "ya, women are like that." Maybe it's just the oversimplification or generalization of those statements and they way they hurt people who don't fit them. Or maybe it's because I feel that I don't fit them? I'm not sure.
Another thing I've noticed recently is that I don't really like being called a man. I like being called a guy or a dude though, and that's usually how I refer to myself, for example I prefer to say "I'm a bisxeual guy," not "I'm a bisxeual man." the first one feels more accurate for some reason, not sure why. Maybe I don't like the term man because of the connotations I have for it. When I think of the word "man," what I picture isn't someone like me, its someone bigger and tougher and i'm not sure, it just doesn't feel like me. Where as when I think of "guy" I think of someone more like me. It doesn't have the same baked in feeling of toughness and hypermasculintiy. It feels more right. So it could be more that it's just the connotation I have of the word, not anything to do with gender? I'm not sure. I also don't really like being called "sir" or "mr." though I guess that could be an "I don't feel old enough to be that" kind of thing, not gender as well. I've tried thinking of myself as a woman or a girl too, just to test this stuff, but I don't really feel that connection either. It usually feels kind of wrong, except maybe when I'm dressed up really fem. I've thought of myself as a girl when doing that, and it feels ok then, but not most of the time when I'm in more masculine attire. I guess overall they feel a bit better then man, but honestly i guess guy still feels the best of everything.
On a similar note, I always feel kind of awkward saying "im a cis man" or even "I'm cisgender." Maybe that's because of all this questioning. I'm someone who likes to be accurate, so the fact that I'm not sure if that is true or not could be why i don't really like it. It could also be that I'm not actually a cis man or cisgender, and that's why it feels wrong, I don't know.
Another thing I've noticed is that I tend to want to be more masculine when I go to queer spaces, and want to be more gender nonconforming if I'm in more straight spaces a lot. This could be because when I'm in queer spaces I tend to be looking for other guys (see I like saying "other guys", but not "other men") who might be interested in me. I may feel like I need to present more masculine for that? not sure. While I might feel more like messing with gender after being in straight spaces because I feel a lack of queer stuff at that point? again, not sure.
I guess the last thing I'll bring up, mostly for completion, is that I've never really felt good in single gender groups. I don't really like being in groups of must men, it makes me feel awkward and like I don't belong. I feel kind of small and week, which could be because I'm physically small and not very strong, or could be something else, not sure. Similarly I feel out of place in groups of mostly women. There I just feel like an intruder, as if I'm stepping in somewhere I shouldn't be. Honestly my ideal group to hand out with is one of mixed genders. That's where I feel most comfortable. I've also noticed that I have an easier time opening up to women then men. This could be bullshit homophobia and toxic masculinity, not sure. Of my close friends right now, most of them are women, with only a few guys I'd say are close friends, though my more general friend group is far more mixed.
So, to wrap things up, I really have no idea what's going on. Maybe I'm just a cis guy who likes messing with gender presentation and has weird connotation to certain words. Or maybe I'm something nonbinary? I've done some looking online and think that maybe I could be a little genderfluid? that could explain the desire to dress in traditional female cloths some times but not others. I'm just not sure if it fits because I don't know if my gender is actually changing or I'm just looking to mess with how I dress. I've also heard of a term called "demiboy." I don't really like the boy part of that, mostly because it makes it sound kind of juvenile. "demiguy" or something like that feels a bit better. Not sure if that's a thing but at least it doesn't make me feel like a kid. To my understanding that means something alone the lines of masculine but not a man? I'm not really sure if that's right but based on google that's what I'm understanding. I guess I'm looking for feedback. Does any of this sound familiar to anyone? based on what I wrote do I sound like I'm a cis guy who likes dresses? or something else? Any feedback would be nice. Also if you got this far, thanks for sticking with the post and reading it all. I appreciate that. Sorry it was so long.

 

There are things about my body I’d like to change, but they have nothing to do with sexual characteristics. More along the lines of wanting a bit less fat here or a little more muscle there, that kind thing.
That being said, the idea of being forced to change doesn’t sound bad. It doesn’t scare me or make me feel wrong. I mean, if I woke up one day as a woman or something it might be scary, but only from a “how did this happen” kind of way. I think I might like it, I’m not sure. It’s not something I feel a need to pursue though. I’m not looking to transition, I guess I just don’t think it would be bad if I did.
There’s a thing I’ve seen several places about testing if you might be trans. It basically says “if you had a magic button that would give you the body of a different sex, would you push it?” My answer is that I’d like to, but on not if pushing it again would change me back. Like, I’d like to try having a different body, but I’m not sure I’d want to stay like that. I guess having a ring that I could put on and take off to change would be fun? That’s kind of how I feel.

 

that does sound pretty similar, and is kind of why I’m having difficulty telling if I just like dressing up or if there’s actually something going on. I’ll have to take a look at that “crossdreaming” thing when I can, it sounds like it might be interesting.