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Finding new ways to explore being non-binary?

Discussion in 'Gender Identity and Expression' started by fairyboy64, Dec 8, 2019.

  1. fairyboy64

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    Hi EmptyClosets! I've been exploring non-binary gender expression over the last half year and I'm finding that it really fits me and I feel really happy about it! But there's some things I want to try that I'm not able to since I'm still in the closet about this whole thing. Here's a couple questions I have about what I'm able to experiment with while still in the closet.

    -Biggest one... girls clothing? I really want to try all of it so I know what I like and don't like, but I have no means of doing so. What should I do? Is there any sort of place that lets closeted trans/non-binary people try on new clothing?
    -I've let my more feminine personality out recently and it's really nice but I want to have people I can interact with as non-binary to try it out more... any good places where I can chat with other enbies?
    -I've been shaving my legs, but I really want to try a depilatory product, to remove hair from other places too. Any recommendations?
    -When it comes to dating / relationships, I want to have a few friends (with benefits maybe??) that I can be really close to, rather than a committed relationship, but I can't help but think about how difficult it will be to find that kind of thing, especially while still closeted. This last one's a tall order, but any advice is appreciated...
     
  2. Dreamsexul

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    Hello fairyboy :slight_smile:

    I'm not in America, but I expect it's the same as the UK, - yes there are places where you can anonymously try on female clothing and even get a make-over and photoshoot. It's great fun, though can be expensive if you want to be made-over and a professional photoshoot too.

    Chatting with NBs is easy on the internet. There's no doubt some here. And there's plenty of other LGBT+ and Trans websites/forums out there. I'm not sure I'm allowed to name them here, but a simple Google search will throw up a fair few. In RL, it might be different. I guess any sizable town/city with a college or young/queer community will people you can befriend.

    I only shave my legs, so I can't comment on using creams etc. But there's an expensive light-zapping thing you can use at home to permanently remove hair.

    And dating is something I don't do or know anything about, so I can't help there, sorry. But best of luck! :slight_smile:
     
    #2 Dreamsexul, Dec 9, 2019
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2019
  3. Jacqui H

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    Hey fairyboy,

    Nice to e-meet you. Welcome.

    There are so many options for you to explore. So many places along the gender spectrum. You can try them all out. It sounds very smart figuring out what works for you and what doesn't.

    I am a binary transwoman. Just to let you know where I am coming from. Although my oldest child(AFAB) is non binary and is dating another NB, they met at their college.

    As far as trying on clothes. I'm sure larger cities having more things like that. Here is what I found in a smaller/large city, 140,000. Most stores don't care. Oddly enough, especially Walmart. Target is pretty good too. Truth be told, most lingerie shops will set up a fitting more people who appear male. I know VS does but they came out with a few comments at the corporate level, in the last few years about transwomen. Therefore I boycott them. If you are still afraid, go to a department store(or large consignment shop) and shop in both the women's and men's areas. Take the items to a fitting room and see what works.

    I wish you love, acceptance and a smooth future. Write if you have more questions. You could also try a local support group if you are by a college or decent size town.

    Warmly,

    Jacqui
     
  4. LaurenSkye

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    The first step I took was buying and wearing women's underwear. If you live alone and/or do your own laundry, that's something that's easy to hide.
     
    #4 LaurenSkye, Dec 9, 2019
    Last edited: Dec 9, 2019
    Dreamsexul likes this.
  5. fairyboy64

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    Hi everyone~! Thanks for all the advice. I do live near a college and I really want to join a support group! Only one of my friends and my sister know that I'm exploring being an enby... so I really want to keep it a secret, too. If there's a support group on EmptyClosets, I'd love to know more about it.
    Also, on the topic of clothing- I don't live alone, so I'm really scared to go buy girls' underwear or socks since my roommates might find out I'm cross-dressing. I'm really interested in trying boyshorts and panties and seeing if I like either of them more than my boxers. I also love girls' ankle socks, and I've tried them before and love them! I'm just too scared to buy them. I gotta find time to go to Wal-Mart or Target alone and try stuff on. Especially since I don't know my size!