Hi, first off I know and accept that I am getting off to male male pornography. I am open about it with my friends and family. But there is something bothering me. I really had many straight encounters and relationships before and I can remember being aroused by girls especially when they had large breast. I can remember just by staring in their eyes my heart started to beat faster and I got a boner. A few weeks ago I had breakfast with a female friend of mine and we started talking about sex. She said that she thinks "we would have great sex" and I became intensely aroused and just wanted to give it to her. Whatever ... I am a overthinking things. My mind is too black and white at times. My question is are there people out there who experienced something like this ?
After I read your post I glanced across to your profile and notice you list your orientation as "other" and that kind of suggests you are still thinking about the label that is right for you. Although you may need to accept that being straight has passed, you don't need to (and perhaps shouldn't) swing entirely to the opposite direction and label yourself as gay when there may be strong residual feelings for the opposite sex. If I were to ask you where you think you are right now with your sexuality, how would you respond?
Hi Patrick, thanks for taking the time to answer. Well, I did choose „other“ because I didn‘t want to put myself in a box. It‘s just... everything is so new to me and I wanted to get some thoughts out. Answering your question, I would say „not straight“
'Not straight' isnt on the list, sorry, gotta choose again! I'm joking of course. Sounds to me like you're at least bi-curious. Maybe you don't need a label. Maybe its all good whatever/whoever. 'not straight' is pretty much how i feel about myself even though i've been in a monogamous opposite sex relationship for 18 years. We both have history of same sex partners, so our mindset is 'not straight/Bi' even though our behaviour isnt.
I think our sexuality is fluid and your still discovering your sexuality. You may be bi or bi-curious and that's wonderful.
@Oliverrrrr Yeah that's what I meant, at least bisexual and whatever comes I'm going to let it happen @cjmiller I can relate to your words, sexual fluidity is something I experienced a lot, although it became more and more present in the last two years. When I'm fine with myself, I'll write something in the coming out section. Thank's for your kindness
Yea- I almost exclusively like lesbian porn. I hate porn with guys in it, like, at all. And I prefer fantasizing about being with women. But in real life I definitely have a strong preference for the opposite sex. I just wish I had been more patient with myself and understood the grey area of sexuality so much better because I do have some faint sexual attraction and intense emotional and romantic connections to women I feel I would like to be with and now that I’m married I feel like I missed out on something. So don’t limit yourself to labels. Just give yourself permission to explore sex fully. That’s all.
For a lot of people, sexual orientation doesn't come with a neat little label that clarifies everything - and that's fine. Sexuality exists on a spectrum - on one end, it's 100% straight, on the other hand, it's 100% gay. A lot of people are somewhere in the middle... 60/40, 80/20, 50/50, whatever. Many, many people out there don't fit into a neat label, and maybe you're one of those people. Nothing wrong with that. Take care.
