I think.. I feel like a sad, emotionless robot, trapped inside of a box. I want to let out my feelings, but I also don't. I want to just keep everything inside so that nobody could see that seriousness inside me. I mean, I'm not one to talk about serious topics. I feel tired, trapped, and sad. I have no idea why. I think I need help, but I don't want to go to therapy anymore. I can't. I go to a boarding school. Oh well it's fine.
Hey there Rainybow, I'm sorry that you feel this way. You're always welcome to post on my wall or PM me. Or you could talk to the moderators or anyone else here. You're not alone, and you're not obligated to deal with this by yourself. Take care, and feel free to PM me.
You're welcome. You seem to be struggling with self expression. Do you happen to paint, draw, sing or write? Those could be great outlets for self expression, and can could help you feel like you aren't repressing yourself nearly as much. I took to writing when I couldn't come out to the people around me, and it helped a lot.
I actually like to do all of those things! I drew a trans and genderqueer pride symbol, and it made me feel really happy. I actually wrote a poem explaining how I feel, and I'm trying to make a cover of reflection. Wanna see the poem?
The pressure feels worse, been quiet since the first day of school. I can feel something coming up my throat, (it’s not col) getting ready to just come out of my mouth. (what do I do?) The words are coming out soon, and so will I. I think I’m doomed. I'm scared that if I try to embrace who I am, I will feel like such a disgrace. Who I am isn't meant to be displayed on a shelf. I can be who I am by just being myself. But what if the real me feels really fake? What if all this courage gets thrown in the lake?
That's great, you should keep it up. Also, give yourself some time, you're young and there's no hurry to figure everything out just yet.
