How to get friends to see you as more than your sexuality

Have you tried telling your friends how you feel about being refered to as the gay guy in the group?

 

That's pretty bad, our sexuality is just one part of who we are. We are just like everyone else. I would be annoyed too if I was introduced that way.

 

I had this problem before. One thing that worked over time was discussing a bit about LGBT issues and how it relates to my life. I remember at one point, I had to inform them that it's a bit inconsiderate to out them to other people even though they are out of the closet. It's a personal journey to even be comfortable with your sexuality (or identity) and to live it openly. Some people won't mind it, some will, and since it does make you uncomfortable, have a sit down with your friends, one on one usually works. It might take some time for them to sink that concept in a bit because they're not too familiar about the "unwritten rules" of the LGBT community.
People usually say that we never stop coming out, and I think they also includes the constant battles that come along with it, where it's being introduced as the gay friend, getting pointed out as the gay man, being the "fashionable" one, being the "butt of the joke", it gets annoying lol. as long as you have something to say about, they'll be able to look past that. Don't feel like you have to be "one of the boys" because there's so much more to life, and if you feel lonely, I'm definitely sure the gay community will have your back on this.....well the mentally sane ones anyways.

 

I agree with Bolt, try to talking to your friends about how it makes you feel. One to one conversations may be better, starting with the friend who you think will be most likely to listen and understand what you're saying.

It would be easy for me to sit here and say "dump them and find new friends" because I don't know anything about these people, but they are obviously friends for a reason, they probably are loyal to you and look out for you, they are just not aware that being called the "gay guy in the group" makes you feel bad,

If I get called the gay member of the group, even among people who are totally fine with gay people, it still brings back unpleasant memories of being picked on and singled out at school and being targeted because of my perceived sexuality. I was not out during my school days, but just because I'm out now doesn't make it ok to have jokes and uneccesary gestures made towards my sexuality. If you accept me into your group, that's great, but don't make an issue of the one thing that makes me different from the rest of your group, or I'll basically end up feeling like a freak all over again.