Friday I took my kids to the open house at our crisis/LGBT center. That was coming out today. We toured the building. They had a station with props. One was a frame that said coming out day and it was right in front of a huge rainbow flag. We were the only ones there and it was so nice. Later that evening I decided to come out on Facebook. I only have 30 friends on there so I believed it was safe. My first comment was from a friend that said did you just say that in public and I'm so proud of you! The second comment was from my bestie. She said bestie you are amazing as always! It felt so happy and comforted. Later that day I came out to my kids. I did a few years ago but they were young and I'm not sure they remember it understood at that time. So I explained it to my 7 year old what coming out of the closet meant and that I'm pansexual. She immediately understood. So next I told my oldest who is 11. She knew I was LGBT but not pan. She didn't understand. So my youngest physically got in the closet and came out saying this is no longer a secret. Oldest still did understand so my youngest said mom is Gaaaaaay! LOL. Saturday we went to comic Con and I bought I pan pride flag in the shape of a Texas. When I bought it I told the vendor that I came out the day before and she said congratulations! My chest tightened and my face turned red but I was so glad to hear myself say it. It felt freeing. Monday my mom went with me to an appointment. We had to wait several hours for the appointment. I wanted to bring it up to her. I wanted to tell her I came out and how good it felt. It was on the tip of my tongue the whole time. Mom doesn't really have the ability to deal with it in the way I want her to. It would have been better to come out like that when it was just us two. My parents think I am lesbian. I ran away with a woman 6 years ago while I was married to a man. My family has said some really fucked up things to me. My sister banned me from her house at that time. She and I have always had a hard time with each other since we became adults. I really would have liked to tell my mom that day. I was scared. Other than that telling Facebook gave me peace. I felt relieved. The acceptance from my children made my heart so happy. I believe that was a beautiful day. The past few years I wanted to come out and on national coming out day I have wanted to come out but I wasn't ready. This time at the last minute I decided to. I'm not sure when I'll come out to my family. My ex-husband is ok with it. He was happy with the way our kids handled it. We are both proud of them. I have been wearing my Halloween shirt I got that says happy Halloween with candy corns with each LGBT pride colors on some of the candies. All the different flag colors. It's also been almost two months since my divorce and I believe that's part of being comfortable to come out. Surprisingly my ex husband is supportive. It's weird because he abused me but now he is being nice to me. So that's my coming out story.
Sorry that was supposed to say my oldest still did not understand til my youngest hid in the closet and came out trying to explain it to her.
Congratulations on coming out! Isn't that feeling just incredibly amazing?!? I totally get how it feels, since I just came out to my mother! And I feel my anguish is finally going to end soon! And now you're divorced, your ex knows about you and, even better, supports you! And so do your kids!! How thrilling it must have been to have their acceptance and being embraced by them! I'm truly happy for you! This is a feeling that only us, gay people, can describe! Keep going on this nice path, I'm sure there'll come a moment you'll be able to tell your mother!
I don't know if this makes sense but it was so relaxing. My kids are wonderful. They are very accepting and understanding at all times. They always have been and I love that about them.
It makes total sense! I guess the reason why it feels relaxing is because we carry this huge burden that society imposed upon us by not accepting how we are. So when you "drop the bomb" it feels like a huge relief, even if the person doesn't take that well. But when they do, it feels even better!
I just got back from the doctor and I have a serious issue which is motivating me to be more like myself. I want to be more out and be proud of who I am.
