My sexuality and other problems have caused lack of experience in dating

So I went to go and see the movie Good Boys (if your interested, the movie was ok, had funny parts but they were all cheap laughs), which is sophomoric comedy about 6th graders who are trying to get to this cool party with girls where there will be kissing. The comedy is supposed to come from being put in more adult situations and there ignorance of girls, sex, kissing, etc. But it pretty much depressed me because due to my sexuality and other issues that I have I isolated myself and did not go thru the normal, boyfriend/girlfriend/dates/kissing/sex thing.

At 41, my sexual/relationship experience consists of being in a "relationship" with a girl in 8th grade. This literally consisted of a late night phone call during my 8th grade overnight field trip to Washington DC in which she asked me out. I said yes and then I believe I got dumped the next day on the bus after I assumed she willing to do more sexually on a first/second date because she dated a highschool boy from another town earlier in the year and I stupidly told her that.Yes, I know that was crappy of me to do and to this day I feel really bad about what I did but I'm embarrassed to find her and apologize. Someday when I get my life together I will do that. I don't remember much about the breakup.

The only other thing in this area of my life was oral expirmentation (or possibly sexual abuse) with my brother when I was 13 and he was 16. I've been to therapy with a therapist who thinks it was but I can't remember much about the details so I am not sure.

Combine this with my lack of a quality job to support myself (I live with my parents after getting fired from the only job that even had a whiff of quality) and I feel like a complete loser who no one, straight, gay or otherwise will ever want to date.

The only saving grace is that my akwardneas with sex and kissing can be somewhat explained as I'm nervous, I've never been with a guy.

However most guys my age have KIDS with more experience with dating/kissing and possibly even sex than I do.