1. This site uses cookies. By continuing to use this site, you are agreeing to our use of cookies. Learn More.

Crush or just friendship?

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by RavenK, May 18, 2019.

  1. RavenK

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2018
    Messages:
    46
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Earth
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    So I have this friend I met last year. We're good friends, and I'm also close friends with her best friend. I've been wondering if I have a crush on her though.

    I think she's attractive and I like the idea of dating her but I'm not sure if I love her or just like the idea of being with someone. I'm thinking about asking her to a school dance next schoolyear.

    I've never had a romantic relationship and I'm not sure what to do. Do I love her? Do I just find her attractive? She's nice, funny, a writer like me. She likes drawing. I feel like I've known her for years!

    I haven't even hung out with her outside of school.

    Does anyone have suggestions on what to do, or on how to figure out my feelings? And if I do like her, how should I approach her? I don't know her sexuality but I do know she's had (maybe still has?) a crush on a guy. (Which I felt sad about.)
     
  2. silverhalo

    Full Member

    Joined:
    Dec 22, 2008
    Messages:
    10,698
    Likes Received:
    3,722
    Location:
    England,
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    Hey I don't think you should worry too much about whether or not you love her just yet. You may or may not come to the conclusion that you like her but even if you like her, love is something you can worry about much later.
    It can be tough to figure out whether you just really like someone as a friend or more. Things to consider are how you would feel if she got into a relationship with someone else? Or whether you feel as though you would like to get closer to her or kiss her etc.
    It might be easier to establish these things if you get to know her better. Maybe hang out with her outside of school, that might also help you establish her sexuality etc.
     
  3. Biblia05

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Apr 14, 2019
    Messages:
    49
    Likes Received:
    23
    Location:
    United States
    Gender:
    Female
    Gender Pronoun:
    She
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I second y he previous advice. Enjoy the process of getting to know her better and finding out what are the things you share in come that can help the relationship stronger. Everything will fall in place in do time not need to push it or over think it. Best of luck
     
  4. RavenK

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2018
    Messages:
    46
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Earth
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    Update: This girl and I are going to Homecoming as buddies. I didn't ask her if she wanted to go with me just if she was going. She said she was and that since we don't know who else is going we can be Homecoming buddies. Don't know if she lowkey asked me on a date or if she just wants to hang out with me. Either way, I'm excited!
     
  5. RavenK

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Sep 11, 2018
    Messages:
    46
    Likes Received:
    1
    Location:
    Earth
    Gender:
    Genderqueer
    Gender Pronoun:
    They
    Sexual Orientation:
    Other
    Out Status:
    Some people
    My friend has a boyfriend. We went to Homecoming as friends. We're still friends but she doesn't know I have a crush on her.