Hi y'all! I just wanted to share that I came out to my husband as bi/pansexual the other night, and it went really great! I knew he would generally be supportive, but I was still concerned that it would raise a lot of insecurities, and he might think our sexual problems were caused by my interest in women. But he took me at my word that I truly don't think my/our sexual problems are caused by my sexual orientation, so that was great. He kind of assumed that my coming out meant that I wanted to start sleeping with women (he wasn't upset about that, just seemed unsure about it). I explained that I didn't really know where I am at in that regard, and that I wanted it to be an ongoing discussion, but really wasn't ready to be making decisions on it yet, and I didn't expect him to make any decisions there yet. He seemed cool with that. I think it will be best for us to let it sink in for a while and see how we are both feeling before we decide whether to open our relationship at all. He was also very supportive of me becoming active in the LGBT+ community. In fact, I just asked him how he would feel about me going out in a couple of weeks for a bi+ladies meetup at a restaurant, and his response was "that's cool. please go." One random side effect, that has been both good and bad - my anxiety has gone down so much since I came out to him! Which means that I am finally getting good sleep for the first time in months, but as a result, I've slept so hard that I got a serious kink in my neck/back. I'll take the temporary pain in exchange for the lower anxiety and openness that I have now!
I'm glad your coming out to your husband went really well! It is good to take it slow and let it all sink in. Keeping the line of communication will benefit your marriage, and please do not stop talking about it. My husband and I still talk about it, and he is supportive as well. My problem is that we live in an isolated and very homophobic place so go out and explore your sexuality! Take it easy, and enjoy! I am happy for you both.
Thanks Mystic flower! I looked at your location, and had to look up Nunavut - I've never even heard of it! It must really suck to be so isolated. I am lucky that I live in a big-ish city that is quite open and accepting (Minneapolis). Although, I have been disappointed to discover that there aren't really any lesbian bars or other hangouts. I was hoping to be able to just go hang out somewhere and get a feel for the community before I started trying to meet people, but I guess I have to just bite the bullet and get to know some strangers! Being very introverted is a bit of a hindrance to me at times.
