Can people be "too nice" sometimes?

Have you ever known someone to be overly nice to you? And I don't mean in a creepy, sleazy way involving lots of physical contact, but I mean when someone keeps complimenting you and talking highly of you, to the point that you get fed up with it and wish they'd go away and find someone else to fawn over, or just treat you like you are an ordinary person and not someone special.

There have been times when I've felt uncomfortable with the amount of praise I've received from certain people. I'm not sure what causes the discomfort, maybe because I always used to be worried about people thinking badly of me, so I would avoid attention. And so when someone is giving me attention because they have positive thoughts about me, it still makes me feel awkward.

Then again, I have acted overly nice towards certain people, and I know my reasons for that. I've had enough unpleasant encounters, some of them people I had to bite my tongue around and not tell them what I really think of them, and so when I meet someone who i really do like, I want to be nice to them, because it feels good to want to be genuinely nice to someone. And then I've been shrugged off by these people, because it seems they don't know how to react to someone being overly nice to them, either.

Maybe it's because when it comes to connecting with people, we want them to be friends and equals to us, and not fans? People I normally admire and look up to are artists and musicians and actors who's work I enjoy. These are not people I'm likely to spend time with in person, and so I'm never going to react to them like they are normal people, even if I do bump into them at a convention or something.

But meeting someone in an ordinary every, day situation who acts so nicely towards you that it almost seems like they're being subserviant and putting you on a pedestal when they don't need to, can be offputting.

 

It's like we're always prepared for negativity from people. We meet a negative person and our instinct is to stand our ground and tell them where to go, then we tell our friends about our encounter with this unpleasant person and boast about how we dealt with them and make a bunch of jokes and comments about what else we could have said and it makes us feel better because we're slagging someone off who annoyed us.

But we probably don't spend nearly as much time talking about a passer by who was polite and friendly to us. If someone smiles sweetly it gives us no reason to bitch and make nasty comments. It seems like negativity gains more attention.

 

Speaking of negative people getting more attention, I went to a local pub last night (for the first time in ages because I very rarey drink in my local pubs) and there was a musician there playing live music, and hardly anyone was paying any attention to him. Then a couple of young guys started squaring off right in front of the stage over some petty argument, and the bouncer came over to keep an eye on them, and some of their friends started gathering around to try to diffuse the situation. The whole floor was crowded until the guys finally moved outside, then the pub was practically empty while the musician carried on his performance. I felt really bad for the musician because he was a brilliant singer and guitarist and he was there to share his talent and give everyone a good evening, and it was the two drunken louts who got all the attention.

I'm going off my own topic here, but it does suck when people choose conflict over a relaxing Saturday night out.