Are you a happy person? How do you feel inside?

I absolutely love this question!

Generally I try to be a happy person and as exhausting as it is, I sometimes feel good about the smallest victories I have or small good deeds I do. I guess it comes down, for me personally, to how I perceive things. I can either be upset and sad about most things (which I am most days) or smile and be happy that they are only steps in the bigger picture. But to answer your question Honey, it's a no (at this point in time anyway) but I strive to be and I guess that is good enough for me.

Sorry for rambling hehe.

 

Answering the question, I try to be happy. Children can be very perceptive to those things. So I work every day to seem happy and strong and ready for everything, to be constant but it is hard. Inside I feel cold, and empty most of the time. However most can't tell, just this week some coworkers decide to present awards to all the members of the team. I received the "life of the party" award. I could not feel fardest from that definition over the last year.

 

Nowadays I have a deep sense of self love and self esteem. My default mode is balance and happiness. Of course I feel stressed, alone, sad, angry etc from time to time but I have developed good skills to handle those feelings and I don't get stuck in them like I often did before.
I practice mindfulness and thankfulness.

When I was single I focused a lot on myself and developed love towards myself which I'm glad I have now that I'm in a relationship. I was happy being single at the end, I'm not scared of being alone anymore like I was before, but I'm even happier now with my boyfriend and I am able to dedicate myself to our relationship without losing myself. I still have my important time with me, myself and I. It's the best of two worlds!

Things are going forwards at my job, I have a new position with a lot of responsibility and I am am more free to make my own schedule than I was in my former position. I like my colleagues. I have bought rainbow colored working shoes

I have been a standup comedian at my spare time for almost 3 years, it's awesome but since I open up about so much personal stuff it also takes a lot of energy. It's also a very stressful environment, I felt performance anxiety all the time. Everything is a contest. So I don't do standup as often, but I don't want to quit completely either. Once in while is enough. I don't want to be famous, I want to be happy.

I love my apartment, I have control over my economy and savings, I have ended toxic relationships, I will buy a cat, I eat fairly well and work out many times a week. I have no gender dysphoria anymore, I love my body and my vagina and feel like I'm man enough anyway (I'm ftm transgender)! I have plans and a lot of time. Can't complain!

 

Nope. Nothing.

 

Not to be edgy, but I am numb. I don't really feel one way or the other, it's just kind of like... nothing. However when a friend does say that they think I'm cool and that yes I am being annoying then that makes me happy for five seconds.

 

yes. for the first time in my life I can honestly say I'm happy. I'm very happy with what I have and with where is my life going.

 

Sometimes I don't even feel worthy of being a happy person. I'm so worried about bothering someone else I can't say what I want, what I need, or be who I am. I've erased this several times because I didn't think the answer would be worth it to you. I don't know why it is I like everyone else more than I like myself. I often find myself going into a pattern of negative thinking. I doubt myself. A lot. I'm afraid that one day I'm going to wake up and realize that I've been doing everything wrong so I just wait, but it never comes. It already did. Everyday I explain how I feel to someone who isn't there. Trying to prove I'm not just sad because of some depression trend and why I'm not sinful because because I like girls cause I'm afraid that one day someone's going to say all these things to me and ask all these questions, but I don't know why it matters to me so much that I have the right answer. I'm so afraid of doing something wrong, I beat myself up when I do. If I know who I am then why isn't that enough? I'm sorry I'm not even sure if this makes sense, but I'm posting it anyway cause I'm pissed and needed to vent. Sorry I'm not trying to be rude or sarcastic.

 

Prior to 1993 mostly indifferent and stoic. There was the occasional meltdown (3) where I tried to bring all to an end.
83 to 93 were years of discovery with a mixture of scared shitless to OMG this is great! Except for those few moments falling through empty space on a mountain side screaming my lungs out.
1993 through 2014 total happiness sharing life with the only person that truly loved me.
2014 to present has ranged from extremely angry, sad, hurtful (to self) to once again indifferent and stoic.
I'd like to be loved again and find that happiness I once had, but I am also fearful of it.

 

I'm not sure. I feel I guess normal. Not happy, not sad. I either feel like this or depressed. It's been awhile since I've felt "happy"

 

On the outside, I generally appear very happy, or rather joyous according to others, especially when I'm with my good friends, doing the things that I actually enjoy. But when I'm alone, left to my own thoughts, I usually fall apart. I always have a mask with a smile ready though, if I have to put it on at any moment, because no one needs to see what's underneath. There are times though, when I'm enjoying the company and the activities enough, where I might actually be happy, and I don't know whether that's from the good distraction, or I just got so good at appearing happy on the outside, from doing it my whole life, that I even convince myself.

 

I feel like this a lot too.

My question for people in this thread: is someone depressed if this happens to them, or does everyone get sad when they are left alone or maybe dwell or things? Is this normal?

 

I can only say for myself, but yeah, I'm depressed pretty much 24/7. With the exception of those moments of distraction.

 

When I'm not at home I'm happy. I don't have to worry about my parents constantly giving me shit for all sorts of reasons. When I'm with my friends it all goes away. I haven't been genuinely happy at home in months now.

 

THAT doesn't good at all, this definitely means you should seek some support or help of some sort.

 

I'm not a happy person. But I believe I have the potential to be a happy person and I want to be a happy person. That's why I'm exploring coming out, is because I feel like I'm not happy because I'm hiding who I am.

 

I think my "normal" state leans towards morose. That could be the result of my shitty upbringing, but hey!

 

No I’m not a happy person. I try to be, but it just rarely works out. As far as feelings inside, tired and frustrated come to mind.

 

I do try to be happy but I’m naturally a glass-half-empty kind of person. I realize now that I got that from my parents .. they always focus on the negative side of things and are overcritical of everyone around them. It’s hard to break away from this pattern.

 

Most of the time I'm just indifferent, at idle, you could say. Other times I can be really happy when something goes my way or I'm with my bf. I admit I'm a bit of a grouch or a hothead when I'm working, but only cause my work is stressful, and no one seems to understand why. Sometimes I get sad when I think about a good friend if mine who passed away..