Hi! Just joined, I’m a 49 year old woman married to a man for over 20 years but I’m bisexual. I was a real tom-boy growing up, loved it when people thought I was a lad and my best friend was my soulmate but eventually I felt I had to grow out of it due to per pressure and hence ended up dating men and getting hitched but never had any kids. My hubby and I split for 3 years several years ago, I almost had a couple of relationships with women but sadly, one was just leading me on (I was desperately in love with her) and I never plucked up the courage to take the second one past flirting. Eventually I ended up back with hubby (long story) but I obviously still have all the same old feelings and urges. He has no idea about my sexuality, I really do love him but I can’t get how I feel out of my head, sometimes I feel it’s driving me insane. Anyway, just wanted to introduce myself and hope to make some new like-minded friends who can understand where I’m coming from. Ciao for now
Hi there, Phoenix70! Welcome to EC. Feel free to chat with me any time about things. I’m always down to meet new people.
Hello, and welcome! I don't really have any experience with a situation like that but it sounds really difficult for you and perhaps maybe if you can, talk to him about it or open up about how you feel and whatnot. But it's entirely up to you, and what you're comfortable with.
Hi! That sounds like a rough situation to be in and I hope you can find some peace regarding it. If you ever need to talk there are many people here (including myself) who'd be happy to help.
Hi Emmareld, I honestly wouldn’t have a clue how to broach the subject with him after all these years and the last thing in the world I want to do is hurt him
Hi Virginia, it certainly feels rough and I really do hope to find some peace with the situation eventually. I guess my mind keeps going back to when we split up, I was pretty darned happy living my life my way, on my own, in my own place. I became mentally strong but now due to various things including me being ill, I just seem to be back to square one. Thanks for the offer of a chat, it’s much appreciated and I will keep it in mind
It's understandable to not want to hurt him because you care about him, but its clear you can't keep it in to yourself either if it is causing a lot of distress. Perhaps seeing someone that is a professional about it and perhaps they can give advice on how to go about the subject and bring it up to him?
Hi there and welcome to the EC community. I hope that being part of the community will help you to gain some insights and a path forward. Feel free to write out your thoughts and share your experiences.
Hey there! I'm new here too. I'm 50. I like to say 49 cos it sounds younger, but ... it's a lie. Lol. I'm a tomboy, too. I've only ever been in straight relationships but have been attracted to tomboy girls and FTM trans people. I was signed female at birth but as a kid, I thought I was a boy. No one batted an eyelid, it was just me. I dressed like a cowboy and didn't like girl stuff. As I grew up, I adopted some of the conventional girl things but mostly remain a tomboy. I wear jeans, hoodies and Converse most of the time. Anyway, I also have a sense of something missing, as you seem to express, even though I have a man in my life who I love and who has no idea about my boy side. I'll tell him one day and, although he'll be a bit sore, I think he'll understand as he has a gay brother and a bi sister, and his ex wife used to be married to a gay man before he met her. I haven't worked out my identity yet, so I'm not going to say anything to him until I understand where I am on the enby spectrum...he'll rightly have questions which I think it's fair to have answers to. I do wonder if he has more awarness about me than I know because he buys me boy clothes as gifts - big sweaters and baseball swag. I do know that although I'm with him, I haven't finished exploring yet and I am drawn to the people I already mentioned (not other men). I don't know what this means for us going forward. I guess he's my companion who I like being close to like a best friend. Some of this sounds a bit like you?
