First off, my apologies if this is not the correct forum for this post or if it's been discussed before, but to be honest Ive no idea where to post this, so please forgive me. Im 62 recently separated from an increasingly toxic marriage of over 28 years and now very very happily engaged to a beautiful, wonderful amazing MTF transgender, she is the best thing that has ever happened in my life. My early life I was 'straight' but had persistent fantasies about being female and enjoyed dressing up as such on the very rare occasion. With my fiancée's support and help Ive decided to transition but lack the courage(at the moment) to do it fully. one of my (many) problems is that I have zero interest in the male masculine body shape and still sexually prefer a womans body shape but prefer sex with a male. So what am I? am I a lesbian transgender? or just strange? I havnt been able find anything useful on the web so hopefully someone can explain this paradox of being male, wanting to be female, sexually preferring the female body but having sex with males. Appreciate your time and comments. Thanks.
Hi Tonya, welcome to EC! I’m glad you found this place. Just to better understand what you’re asking, when you say that you “prefer the female body shape”, but would rather have sex with men, what do you mean? Do you not like having penetrative sex with women, or do you not like engaging in any sexual activity with women at all? Do you see yourself as a women when you have sex with men, and so arises the preference for activity with men? Gender identity and sexuality are separate, so I think your gender identity is the most important part of this, but as someone who has been in the same boat, I can understand the possible confusion that comes with trying to sort both out at the same time.
Hi Hanyauku, thank you so much for yr reply. I have no interest anymore of penetrative sex with a woman, in fact when i was married, sex was something to get over and done with a quickly possible and afterwards I felt strangely quilty. something i could never understand but now I think i know the reason When i have sex with a man I very very definitely see myself as a woman and love the feeling of being the 'bottom' however i don't feel turned on by a mans body, if i see a nice shapely woman my immediate thoughts are ' i wish i had a body like that ' or 'I wish i had boobs likelike that' but it's never in a sexual way. i don't think i could ever have sex with a man with me being male, i can only do it if I'm as a woman. Again thanks for the reply
