A while back, (after seeing one of my old friends from school) I discovered that well I like girls as well as boys. At first I was really terrified and panicked. I couldn’t even begin to comprehend what was happening. But it got better, I told my closest friend who helped me a lot, i accepted my feelings a bit better and I even joked a bit about it with my friend. Yet i haven’t accepted myself (plus my parents don’t exaclty know and judging their past reactions, i’m terrified of telling them that i’m bi) I still occasionally slap myself when I catch myself looking at a girl’s body. As if it was something to be ashamed of (which angers me because i shouldn’t be ashamed of this). I feel awkward around girls and it bothers me. I can’t hug one of my friends without being oddly aware of their breasts. I also hate the constant back and forth in my attractions. Even in my dreams I can’t seem to focus on one or the other gender. It’s a constant metamorphosis of their body from male to female. In itself this isn’t a problem, but for someone who hates being in the gray zone as much as myself, being bisexual is really hard for me to deal with and accept. So yeah I’m still having a hard time accepting myself as bisexual and was wondering if some of you had any advice on how to deal with it and accept it.
I'm glad you're aware your sexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. That's a good first step. Don't be to hard on yourself. Learning to accept yourself often means unlearning negative stereotypes about LGBT+ people. It takes time. You sound young so just know as cliche as it sounds some of the awkwardness around girls will likely lessen as you become more comfortable. It'll get better.
hey there. coming from a struggling bisexual--it will get better. even if your path doesnt look like a straightforward and clear road, it will improve. it takes time to challenge the blocks we have in our own minds sometimes. you will be okay.
