I am grateful that EC gives its members the opportunity to post either an avatar or a photo. I can understand that some folks may be weary of posting pictures of themselves. They may not be out, or young etc... When I first joined I almost posted an avatar, but then thought about it. I said to myself, "I am finally out. Why be embarrassed of who and what I am?" So I posted my own picture. That little step was quite theraputic in a way, helping me make this transition out of the cobwebs of the closet into the light of day!
I completely get where you are coming from. When I accepted my own bisexuality it was such a relief. Little by little as I’m come out as bi (1st to my wife) and then to some close friends that has been therapeutic as well. I love being able to share on EC and meeting people that may be traversing a similar path in life. I am a big wine lover and I live in wine country so my profile pic was reflective of that. In my real life I am not out to the masses and I work in a suit and tie conservative job. I know for certain that my sexuality would not be resoundingly accepted and for now I remain somewhat in the closet. Who knows what the future holds, I hope that someday peoples views will be far more accepting. I do know that the younger generations are more accepting so over time things may change. Cheers and have a great Holiday Season!
Dionysios.....As you mentioned, I was one of the people who used an avatar mostly because I was not publicly out. However, my avatar has come to mean more than that...it is who I am inside. Mentally and emotionally my avatar is how I see myself! .....David
I totally inderstand! Many folks are not out and I get tjat. So glad that your avatar has acquired a deeper meaning for you!
Thanks so much for sharing. I am gradually coming out (just this afternoon I came out to my best friend). For work purposes, I don't plan to go completely public until spring. Yet it is highly doubtful anyone I know will come visit this site. That's another reason I felt comfortable posting my picture.*smile* Hope you have a joyful and healthy holiday!
I am really tempted to use my photo... but.... I work in the queer community, and I am wary that someone who comes to see me professionally would see me here and then not feel comfortable sharing their experiences either here or when meeting me.. not likely but there very well may be someone who comes in to see me who also comes on here.
I thought this site did not allow photos or anything at all that could be used to connect a person in real life to their account here. I was under the impression that it was a pretty firm policy. Mandy
Really? Thought that policy referred to full names email, social media, addresses etc.... I very much doubt that anyone who knows me would stumble across my photo. If I am mistaken, can easily remove it.
I agree that this is a very personal thing. Some are either out enough or simply not worried to show their face. Others are not out or simply value their privacy. Whatever works for them...
I almost posted an avatar, a self portrait of myself from decades ago, Like @quebec it is how I see myself. Instead for now I have an image that speaks to me of the shift that has occurred, or the hope that I somehow understand if there is indeed a key/switch that relates to the changes in attraction I feel. Most everything I post here would be harmless if connected to me in real life, except what that would feel like to my wife. I respect her, and when I write here about her I would not want that to influence how others see her IRL.
I quite understand your view. My wife is a wonderful woman and is going through a tough time with my coming out. Nothing I write about on this site would reflect on her in a negative light, even if discovered by people who know us. For posts about myself, I am not concerned.
The policy regards social media, gamer tags, etc. that would allow for and enable communication outside of EC. That aspect of the policy is fairly firm to help maintain the security and privacy of underage members of EC but is applicable across the board. There are plenty of people who have actual photos for their profile, selfies are pretty harmless.
I have posted pictures (obscure angles) of myself from time to time...kinda sticking my toe in the water...then I get scared a remove it
This comment, & Dionysios’ original make this an honest, pleasing and informative thread. Nice work all who’ve contributed. Classic EC quality . .
I figured I might as well use a photo of me. Either way it is okay. I am me no matter what I would use avatar or photo.
I'm in two minds, originally the avatar was a must. I've shared so much of my life here. If my ex wife read it she wouldn't be happy with my honesty. My profile says Rade but I now sign off as Jon, so I've let the barrier down somewhat now. I will consider a photo as I have nothing to hide and I'm openly gay now. 10 months have passed and I've shed many layers of my hidden self. I'm proud to be gay and if people don't like it who know me they can f off as I'm beyond worrying. We get one precious life and this should include some happiness.....Jon
