Sorry for creating so many threads again. 2 weeks ago, I turned 17 and I have recently had a change in my dress sense. I used to be a very casual guy in terms of dress sense, usually just sweatpants and T-Shirts. I haven't bought anything yet, but I want to take on more of a metrosexual style. As a young gay man, how should I dress? How do gay men dress in general?
Well, they don't have an actual single style as I have seen them dressed in all kinds of clothing styles. Business casual is usually a good look for most guys. Slacks, button shirts with a collar or Polo style shirts.
It's easier to just show you than describe it with words. Here are some of my completely out of the closet gay friends, with their faces removed for obvious privacy reasons. The ages are all between 18-22 so the same as guys your age pretty much. The first two are masculine, the second two are feminine.
Gay men dress in all different styles. Some are more flashy and flamboyant, others are more simplistic. Some probably find a middle ground. I think it mostly depends on personality and/or personal style. I have found the more boisterous gay men to get a little more wild with their clothing choices and tend to lean towards the bright colors and patterns, and perhaps make fashion choices others wouldn't. Hell, my best friend tends to just wear hoodies and jeans. I have never seen him wear anything typically deemed "gay" and he's been out for at least the ten or so years that I've known him. I also had a college classmate that was gay but never wore anything that stood out; sure he got a little dressier on occasion (dress shirt and tie), but nothing ever flashy. Gay men can wear any style of clothing they are comfortable with.
I don't have a particular style....but since leaving my wife I purchase clothes that make me happy and confident. I now take everything to the changing room in two sizes and try them all on...I don't ask anyone for their opinion....I feel so more confident now I have embraced being bi...gay... Yeah....
From dressing like every other guy to camping it up to wanting to make a statement. The choice is yours. I've also seen where a guy's wardrobe is fully conventional except for one or two items that aren't and which they were infrequently. For one guy, it appears to be a jacket just like the one popularized by the film "Brokeback Mountain." He keeps it very clean and rarely wears it.
Even if I were to generalize I don't think I could pin it down to a particular style. Gay gays come in too many flavors. I would, however, say that overall in my experience they just dress better. I think they put more thought into their personal appearance. Compared to straight guys, gay guys are cleaner, spend more on clothes, spend more time and money on grooming and are more likely to belong to a gym and work out regularly.
It seems as if gay men have a variety of different styles. @OGS has a fair point that gay men do tend to dress a bit better. I wonder why that is. Women seem quite attracted to well presented men. Although guys are visual, are gay guys really attracted to someone by their dress sense?
There's no platonic ideal of how a gay man should be dressed. It'll come fairly naturally to you as you experiment with clothes but you can't just pick an entire style off the shelf in one go. I didn't care all that much about clothes as I was leaving school. Now I have a pretty extensive clothes budget, which ranges from pretty outrageous festival outfits to good bushwalking, gym and snow gear, skinny jeans, suits for work, funky summer shorts and shirts, polo shirts and RMs. Each style took me a different stage of experimentation to get into. None of them was 'me' until all of a sudden they were - you're just going to have to try things out. Shop around, set a budget and see what works out for you. You might find yourself with lots of different styles that depend on social situation and geography. You might not really like clothes as you feel more secure in yourself and just stick to a bunch of plain clothes you're comfortable in - that's also fine. What you probably shouldn't do is wear clothes exclusively to feel attractive - it ends up fuelling insecurity in a different way and stifles self-expression.
This thought about personal appearance includes knowing what looks good together - what pants, what shirt, what shoes. Then again, most people know that a dark green shirt goes with nice jeans and you can often end up with a straight guy with a good job and who keeps himself fit being able to pull a lot of these combinations off. At that point, body language and where and how a person looks around becomes more telling than apparel. What's attractive is when someone pulls this off without looking like they're trying too hard.
For me, I usually go with jeans and a t-shirt. Nothing too crazy mainly because picking options in the morning stress me out. But, I do take my jeans to my tailor to make sure they fit right, I get t-shirts that fit me well and don't look bad, and I get t-shirts that I get excited about to wear. I also like to play with my shoes more than my clothes. 1) they are fun 2) they can help you pull of jeans and a tshirt without making you look like a teenager at all times haha This truly. The point is for you to play around with how you want to look. What makes you feel comfortable? What do you wish you could "pull of?" Whatever that is try it out. Its scary, but that's part of the beauty of it all. What makes it fun is learning how to be vulnerable, be courageous and take chances with yourself. If you feel lost I honestly would recommend the new Queer Eye on netflix. They do such a good job and focusing on the journey rather than just the clothes themselves. I'm going to highly disagree with this. This is an impossible thing to pull of and it makes you start dressing with other people in mind instead of focusing on what feels good to you. I say go ALL in and try as hard as you fucking want. If someone thinks trying hard to take care of yourself is unattractive then that person can go gawk at someone else for their enjoyment. Try hard and show off. Do what feels good to you and take care of yourself.
I meant that some people are just a natural fit with the clothing they've picked and it doesn't take much thought. If talking downtown, then, yes, I notice a fine suit and all the items that go with that. If we are talking about leisure time, I think that casual clothes that don't scream "look at me" are preferable to those that do. This also probably goes with noticing less flashy people rather than those who are too accessorized, too tanned, and too ripped. But that's just me.