Sometimes the advice others give on the subject can be rather flawed, so let's talk about that. Here's a list of responses which annoy me; - "They only do it because they have a crush on you!" Doesn't excuse bad behaviour. - "Oh toughen up". Teaches someone that they shouldn't share their emotions and should suffer in silence instead. "I hear you're being bullied, that's bad". I know...bit of a redundant statement. Still, I appreciate that you're trying to help. "But we don't have bullying here, look, we even have an anti-bullying poster!" Yeah, one where two kids beat each other up next to. "Oh just ignore it, they'll stop!" Sometimes this works...but other times it can actually make people more determined. Being physically attacked and/or verbal abuse is kind of hard to ignore as well. Feel free to add your own.
I was kind of a clumsy kid in school when I was younger. My dad took me to a martial arts dojo when I was 13. It taught me self confidence which is one of the best defenses against a bully... but also is a round house kick to the face.
"Fight fire with fire". Now in some cases this might be correct, but if the bullying is of a physical nature, I'm not sure it's a good idea to tell someone to fight like that. Escalating things rarely delivers a good outcome.
They’re just jealous of you was something that really pissed me off. They weren’t jealous just mean. I bet if I and them had known then I really had a disability they wouldn’t have called me a retard. I also got called weird a lot. We moved often when I was a kid and unlike my siblings I’m socially awkward and have zero filter. It took six years to make friends who didn’t get offended by me. One of them said that they don’t take the mean things I say personally. I didn’t know they were mean. I haven’t had any friends since I left school. It’s kind of lonely but I’ll live.
"You shouldn't let them bother you." Not helpful when they're interfering with every aspect of your work life. This makes YOU the one responsible for your reaction, when in fact THEY are the ones responsible for their sadistic treatment of you.
I got told this. Hard to ignore guys throwing milk cartons at your face in the cafeteria and scribbling insults on your desk in Sharpie. This was the shittiest piece of advice I ever got told. They never stopped. If anything, it got worse.
''Just tell an adult'' Yeah, most of the time they don't care :/ I learned to handle it by myself most of the time. I got picked on in high school, but I frankly didn't care. I ignored them, and if they really pissed me off, I hit them. Kind of surprising I only got suspended once, lol. Most of them just... went on to someone else, because I was no fun. I honestly was my worst bully through high school anyway.
