Although I have been a member on here for many years, I took a bit of a break, trying to establish firmly in my head my true sexuality. And, yes, I'm gay! If you met me in the street, you would see a guy, over six feet, 200 pounds, size 11 feet, jeans and sweatshirt with an interest in fast cars, ice hockey and an in depth knowledge of female porn stars What you wouldn't see is the girl underneath, the girl with anger issues, a love of clothes and shopping and a real interest in naked men. She doesn't come out very often in public. I consider myself 75% female but have no wish to change my gender. It wouldn't look right, for a start, and I'm old enough to have a well established network of family and friends which I have no wish to disrupt. So I carry on and, who knows? Maybe in a year or two my perception may change and she may come out more often. That's the thing many of us fail to fully understand. We have the freedom to choose. As for coming out as a homosexual, I haven't yet. But, from here on, new people I meet will be told. I'm gay!
Thank you so much! Now my own homosexuality at last has become undeniably clear to me, I may be a little more use!
@Hugh Great to see you on here! I think it is wonderful that you are starting to introduce yourself as gay to friends. Reading your post though, I ask even though you don't want to come out as female to disrupt your life (understandably), do you at least allow yourself times to express that part of you fully? I mean feeling 75% female is a big part of you. I ask only because one of my friends growing up told me she couldn't hide that part of her because the feelings were just to strong. To the outside world mostly she was a he (6'4 black man), but around me and some other close friends she would wear her dresses and scarves and makeup and she loved buying high heel shoes. Always a lot more femme than I ever will be...lol. I just hope you have found a way to express that part of you.
I have and I do, but not publicly very often. I did yesterday but it was more of an androgynous look. I won't make myself an object for people's mirth because it diminishes the experience. I'm too old to have to explain myself but I have found contentment with life. My two sides manage to co-exist quite amicably these days. The trick is not to expect too much.
Though we chatted a bit, I don’t get a chance to properly greet you. Welcome to EC. hope you find some good friends here. Feel free to discuss your inner girl with me anytime. My mental age is only that of a 15 year old as I think her and I will get along quite well. Welcome again. Take care. V.