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Fear that men would want me to have sex with them

Discussion in 'Family, Friends, and Relationships' started by Vega222, Oct 17, 2018.

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  1. Vega222

    Vega222
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    Hi,

    I have a problem with every single man who i meet and want to make friend with.
    I've had quite several experiences that a man want me to have sex with them and they were all "unexpected".

    Once i met an old man in his house, I wanted to work for him. But he wanted me to have sex with him! It was much surprising because i even hadn't told him i'm gay!

    Another one was when i date with a boy. He already asked me to don't want sex from him himself! He said if you want sex go for another guy. But when i went to the meeting he started to touching me!

    The last one was when i met an Internet friend. It was one of the first times i met someone who knows i am gay. After that, he told me i was thinking about having sex with you when we were on the meeting! He didn't mean anything bad, Apparently. But, still, it felt bad and once again made me feel like every man would want to have sex with me if i want to make friend with them.

    When it's getting more friendly with a guy, I always have that fear that maybe he's thinking about sex with me and that's the reason he's making friend with me. I fear he will eventually say that i want to sleep with you.
     
    #1 Vega222, Oct 17, 2018
    Last edited: Oct 17, 2018
  2. Rade

    Rade
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    It nicer to get to know the person first....I wouldn't want sex on a first date, perhaps a nice kiss if it felt right.
    Some people expect sex on a first meeting and that's ok if both want that but like you I would feel uncomfortable and pressured by that.
     
    #2 Rade, Oct 18, 2018
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  3. Vega222

    Vega222
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    I meant every men. Not just those who supposed to be my boyfriend.
     
    #3 Vega222, Oct 19, 2018
  4. beenthrdonetht

    beenthrdonetht
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    It might be just randomness. Next week every male you meet might refuse to speak to you. Or face it, you might just be good-looking.
     
    #4 beenthrdonetht, Oct 24, 2018
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  5. Vega222

    Vega222
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    Please...
    I need more answers. :‌)
     
    #5 Vega222, Oct 26, 2018
  6. DecentOne

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    You don't have control over how others feel, you have control over how you react. If he eventually says he wants more than friendship (and you don't want more) tell him you just wanted to be friends, and you can back off for a bit and decide if he can go back to just friendship. If you feel threatened or afraid, stay away from him.
    I'm sorry you have had situations where you had sexual advances you didn't want. I hope they didn't assault you.
     
    #6 DecentOne, Oct 27, 2018
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  7. Priyanshu

    Priyanshu
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    Hi How are you?
     
    #7 Priyanshu, Oct 27, 2018
  8. Vega222

    Vega222
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    It's not sexual relation or sexual assaulting that i'm afraid of. It's just expressing that thing unexpectedly. I don't like to hear it. I don't like to know they have such feelings and desires.

    And it has nothing to do with being handsome or something like that. There are many more handsome people, And i don't think they've had such experiences.
     
    #8 Vega222, Oct 27, 2018
    Last edited: Oct 27, 2018
  9. monsterboy

    monsterboy
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    What you may be defining as friendly, they may be seeing as flirty. Lots of laughing, eye contact and touching (even just a small brush of the arm or hand) can really give a guy the wrong impression.
     
    #9 monsterboy, Oct 29, 2018
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  10. Vega222

    Vega222
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    I kinda think like that. Not exactly though. I mean i kinda blame myself for that. I think maybe there's something in me (and it's a natural part of me) that makes people think about it or makes them want to do it. I don't know. :thinking: Isn't it a logical conclusion?
     
    #10 Vega222, Oct 30, 2018
    Last edited: Oct 30, 2018
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