This may be an out there topic, but it is a question I have for those who come out later in life or after years of denial before being in a same sex relationship. A little background info before the question: As a teen I was in same sex relationships. I didn't know the term, just knew I liked girls and girls liked me. I was in a committed relationship for two years until my mother discovered I was 'vile and evil' her words and moved me across country after a stint in a private facility to correct my sinful behavior. I went into 100% denial and lived straight. My answer to the following questions are both no. Have you ever had orgasms with the opposite sex while you were straight without assistance (toys, thoughts of same-sex,etc.)? ' Have you ever been felt heartbroken over an opposite sex break-up?
Question 1: yes, I have had an orgasm with a man, but not from penetration. I could only orgasm with a guy from oral sex. I still have trouble orgasmimg just by penetration with my current fiance (female), but it has happened more frequently. And of course oral still does the trick Question 2: I was engaged to a guy previously. While I was upset when it ended, it was more of a relief. At first, I was more angry that he did it right after I had picked my dress and spent time planning a wedding and telling friends and family. It was fairly easy to get over the breakup, but it has been a challenge getting past the mental damage he caused (he was not the most emotionally supportive or nicest person).
1. Yes, more times than I can possibly count. 2. Only once because it was my first real relationship and I fully intended on marrying her, so I thought I would be alone forever and didn't know what to do after it ended.
Q1. Yes, but only a few times. It looked like it wasn’t going to happen for the first couple of years. My partner basically stopped trying and sex was all about him, but then he tried oral and that worked. I think it must have been the novelty because it doesn’t work now. Q2. Yes, but in retrospect that was more fear of being alone, than the actual person. More recently my partner had a relationship with a colleague that was probably leading up to an affair. I found out he’d seen her outside work, when he’d told me that he was doing something else, and he said that he was excited by possibility of somebody seeing them together. Even though I wasn’t happy in the relationship, I did feel upset about the situation.
Q1. Yes. I never struggled in that dept with an opposite sex partner BUT I did have to think of the same sex in order to push me over the edge...so thinking about it...maybe I did struggle?? Q2. Yes and no. I wouldn’t say it was actual heartbreak when I ended the relationship with my ex (who was male btw). It was more a very very deep sadness that I had hurt him in such a way along with the guilt that followed me around because I left him due to my sexuality. But actual heartbreak, I don’t think I’ve ever truly experienced that.
I've been in denial before discovering I'm lesbian too. I was so deeply in denial, I did anything I could to not be perceived as gay, I even avoided holding hands with other girls, that's how deep it went. 1. No, I had to use my imagination and my own hands to make it work. My partner in my head turned really girly and I became the 'man' or else it didn't work. 2. I was the one initiating them, so no, I felt relieved and quite happy but that happiness was smeared with guilt. I thought there was something wrong with me for feeling that way.
I think that most of us who discovered their true sexuality later have felt the same as the OP. The first part is quite easy to answer. Yes I was orgasmic with a man. I didn’t get there every time but I guess that’s pretty normal wherever you sit on the sexual spectrum. The second part is much harder. I’ve been saddened when relationships ended but heartbroken? I don’t think I ever have. I suspect that heartbreak is something you can only feel when something truly traumatic happens. I don’t know if I want to experience it or not.
question 1: yes, for a man, it feels very nice to be inside a woman even if you're gay.but it was never as intense as thinking about a guy and more often than not I had think about a guy. question 2: yes, very intensely.
You made me really think here and reflect on my past. Answer to number 1 - yes but it been many years since. For a long time I've had to think about naked men. Number 2 is the one I had to think hard about because, if I'm honest the answer is no. Sad, sure but not heart broken.
Hello I had a gay relationship in my teens, then married for 20. Occasionally I would think of men during sex with her but more often than not I was happy and the sex with her was good. We would both orgasm. I didn't really like looking at the vagina. Though I liked touching it . I'm now single, looking to date a guy. My long stint in my marriage doesn't change my sexuality. I'm more attracted to guys . Me and ex just had a special relationship. I don't think I want sex with another woman. Rade
