So recently i feel in love with a man so much older than me ... We talked about everything and it even got sexual... But when i told him that i loved him he said that it was the lust to talking ... I tried to explain but it simply made things worse he 'friendzoned' me ... I cant get over him ... But i try so hard.. Extra: I am 17 almost 18 he is 33. We both know the trouble we can get into ... I dont care about his age i only care that he was what i wanted. .
At your age perhaps the age gap seems big, but as we age it's not always a problem. I feel your pain and can tell you really liked him. It's only my opinion but I'm a bit concerned and think, he is using you just for a physical relationship. It's ok if you both know where you stand in the relationship. Please look after yourself.... Rade X
I'm sorry that he declined, but I'm sure it's for the best. Despite what a lot of people say (age being just a number and whatnot), age gaps ARE a big deal. If you're 17/18, dating a man who's in his 30s, you're not AT ALL at the same stage in life. You're probably finishing high school/moving on to university or college, while he's already done with all of that. There's a big imbalance of power, simply because he's making the dough and you're not yet there. He has living experience, while you're probably moving out for the first time (if you have moved out yet). It's super easy to get taken advantage of in those kinds of situation. Personally, I have a friend who's in the same situation (though he is dating the guy in question), and I wish he'd wake up, because his relationship is not healthy.
I can imagine how much this must hurt. That said, he is almost certainly correct that it is lust rather than love, and that it would not work in the long term. An age gap relationship where the other person is twice your age is pretty much doomed to either fail or be horribly unhealthy. Quite frankly, I agree with Rade that this person was not behaving ethically, as it sounds like he basically used you for sex and ran away when you started to feel serious about it, so this isn't someone you'd want to be with in any case. Additionally, everything that RainbowGreen said is right on the money as well. As hard as it may be for you to see this right now, it is really for the best, and hopefully in the future, you'll aim at people closer to your own age.
