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Have you ever confessed your love to someone who didn't feel the same way?

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by bulbul, Oct 11, 2018.

  1. bulbul

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    They say you can't help who you fall in love with. Regardless of whether or not this statement is true, is telling someone you love them when you're not sure how they feel the right move? Have any of you ever taken the chance and professed your feelings to someone and have them turn you down? If so, how did that make you feel? And how did it affect your relationship with that person?


    On that note, have u ever been told by someone that they love you when you didn't feel the same way? How did you react?
     
  2. DragonBoys

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    Oh shit, I did exactly that. I told my friend that I had loved them and wanted to be nore than friends with them but as they were aromantic, they didn't feel the same way. And our relationship hasn't been the same ever since. I don't really take breakups or rejection really well because I just get too emotional/invested in relationships probably because I just care about the person too much. So when they said they didn't like me back, it fucking hurt a lot. This was about 2 years ago and I'm still very upset about it. Likewise, our friendship kinda thinned out and now we rarely speak to each other anymore. I hate this feeling; it's miserable, it's awful and I find myself now struggling to climb out of depression and anxiety because of it.

    Ever since then, it's been rough emotionally, but at least I have the experience of being rejected so I can hopefully comfort others who have been in a similar situation. As for being loved by someone, no one has ever said that to me.
     
  3. mbanema

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    Exclusively. But as awful as it feels to get shot down, I've never regretted it. I think in every case it's actually helped me to get closer to the person I like (even if not the capacity I want) and it's better to know for sure than to always wonder what might have happened. I don't like very many people, so in those exceedingly rare instances where I find someone that I think is very special, I want that person to know how I feel.

    As for the reverse, no, I'm not the kind of person that someone would crush on.
     
  4. alwaysforever

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    Yeah, I fell in head over heals in love with a friend. Confessing my feelings had disastrous consequences, and the loss and pain I experienced was traumatic. Even with all of that, I don't regret being honest, although I should have talked about my attraction from the start. Losing the friendship has scarred me pretty badly. I'm not really ever going to be the same, but I take it one day at a time.
     
  5. DragonBoys

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    I'm sorry to hear that and I understand how hard it must be to deal with these emotions and press forward. I'm a message away if you need to chat
     
  6. DragonBoys

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    I agree that it's better to just confess than just wait in limbo for nothing really ever to happen, especially if you've known that person for a little while. And if it doesn't work out, I find that talking to my other friends as well as just online in forums tends to help a little bit. It certainly is a process
     
  7. Forlong

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    I was so in love with a guy back in high school, he was a junior and I was freshman. Anyway wrote him a letter confessing my love for him, gave it to him at school before heading to class. I watch as he walk away without saying a word throw it the trash. He didn’t even read it,I felt so devastated. We had lockers next to each other, I refused to go to it. I carried my books everywhere with me I couldn’t face him. I didn’t open up to any boy or girl after that, didn’t trust no one. In my early twenties I had a guy at my place of employment tell me he had a crush on me. I was skeptical, I didn’t really trust him maybe from past experiences.
     
  8. Mystic flower

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    I did tell my crush that I am interested in her. She was kind to me and turned me down gently. We communicated for a while, and when she moved, we barely keep in touch. Her rejection hit me hard.
     
  9. Love4Ever

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    Wow. That's so horrible. What a jerk. No one deserves to be treated that way. I'm sorry for what happened to you.
     
    #9 Love4Ever, Oct 12, 2018
    Last edited: Oct 12, 2018
  10. Chierro

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    I've confessed to crushes before. After I was over the crushes, though. Every guy I confessed to was fine with it. Those were easy because they were straight and I knew that nothing would happen.

    The one that actually hurt was a guy I had met online and harbored feelings for for years. He knew, we just didn't address it. When our friendship was falling apart. I was head over heels in love with the guy and we had never even met. That one hurt, even though I knew going into it that he didn't feel the same way.

    Freshman year of college I had a friend confess feelings for me. That one was actually kind of awkward because I was not attracted to him at all, I just liked him platonically. So, I did my best to turn him down nicely.
     
  11. Forlong

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    @Love4Ever thank you :slight_smile:, it taught me not to put people on a pedestal. I thought he was perfect but he wasn’t and I don’t regret giving him that letter.
     
  12. Love4Ever

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    I understand. I have idolized many people in my life. It's hard to have that shattered.