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I wish people would stop using OCD incorrectly.

Discussion in 'Chit Chat' started by Canterpiece, Sep 19, 2018.

  1. Canterpiece

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    Sometimes people joke that I might be OCD, even though the things they point out aren't even related to the concept of OCD at all. Liking my ruler in a particular place or keeping certain foods separate isn't OCD, I don't do those things to deal with obsessive thoughts. The food thing is because I like plain foods, too many textures and flavours at once can be a bit much for me. I'm a Highly Sensitive Person. Other times I like things in a particular section or order because I'm feeling stressed, bored, awkward, or out of place. Such as if I'm at a party and I'm not quite sure how to make conversation with someone in particular, so I'll avoid them and organise the sweets/chocolates by colour in another room instead.

    It can be annoying because people sometimes come up to me and purposefully ruin a pattern and say "Oh sorry, does that bother you?" and if you say yes they continue to do it because it's entertaining to them. Please stop. Let me have this one thing. I'm already feeling uncomfortable in this situation, I'm doing this to keep my mind occupied and give myself a sense of control/ escape. You're ruining it. Now I'm irrationally stressed.

    Maybe you could argue that it's OCPD or just being particular, but it's not OCD. From my understanding, OCD is when you have negative thoughts that you obsess about and have actions/routines you feel compelled to do compulsively as a way of dealing with these thoughts. It is possible that I may have OCD, but not because of my actions I listed above. Checking that the oven is off multiple times because I worry about burning the house down might be OCD or just anxiety in general, but the fact that I rhythmically twirl some string around my finger/throw and catch an umbrella a certain amount of times (not because of obsessive thoughts, but because it's a calming action that helps me clear my mind) or like my food separate sometimes isn't. That is all.
     
    #1 Canterpiece, Sep 19, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2018
  2. Love4Ever

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    I do too. I suffer from Pure O with obsessive intrusive thoughts and it's horrible.
     
  3. Broccoli

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    I o

    I do all these things and am also super-sensitive to smells, noises and scratchy clothing (I have to cut the labels out of everything and can't wear anything tight-fitting or made from a material that isn't 'soft'). Several people have suggested that I might have Asperger's/ASD and I 'pass' all those Asperger's tests you can find online.
     
  4. Canterpiece

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    Same.

    My clothing is often kept casual because of this, although my eczema being triggered by certain fabrics contributes to that. Sometimes I have to leave the room if a particular food has too strong of a smell. High pitched whistling is a pet peeve of mine, and some common everyday sounds physically hurt my ears. Shopping centres are sometimes hard to deal with (especially if they are crowded) but I do like feeling the fabric of the clothes in shops. Although the fact I sometimes end up nervously stuttering and acting awkward around cashiers isn't great.

    People have suggested it to me online, but nobody has ever remarked on it IRL personally. Usually on those tests I either get "More Autistic traits than average, but not enough to signify Autism/Possibly BAP (Broad Autism Phenotype)" or "Borderline indication of ASD".

    I tend to get a higher score if it includes my past behaviour rather than just my present. Depends on the test. Whereas ones for OCD I typically score moderate or just about mild. Of course, these tests aren't always accurate and shouldn't replace a proper diagnosis.
     
    #4 Canterpiece, Sep 19, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2018
  5. Andrew99

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    This is the worst case of ocd I have ever seen. Fast forward to 8:00. You might actually have to click on the link ‘watch this video on youtube’ if it says video unavailable.
     
    #5 Andrew99, Sep 19, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2018
  6. Broccoli

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    Very true. Every now and then I wonder whether I should go for formal assessment - maybe it won't make any difference to my life but I like to know things!

    Incidentally - your signature is great :-D
     
  7. Canterpiece

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    Thank you. :slight_smile:
     
  8. Destin

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    Wow, that one is pretty bad. The worst I've seen was a Vietnam veteran who suddenly started patrolling his house with a rifle checking every lock, door, window etc. all night every night decades after the war ended. He was getting barely 2 hours of sleep a day for years in 20-30 minute intervals because he always thought the locks were unlocked and he had to go check them again.
     
  9. dyl pickle

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    I agree, I hate it so much. I have pure o and it's living hell, even if people used it wrong I wish they just at least knew they were using it wrong, but most people don't even know what it really is. Lately I think it's been getting worse - I think I'm starting to have compulsions as well, but they're mainly hair plucking. I used to check my teeth and gums in the mirror a ridiculous amount of times and I still do, but that part has gotten better.
     
  10. BiGoth1982

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    To be honest, it doesn't matter if what you have is strong OCD or not, people should respect your boundaries. I think if the way you feel about certain things is interfering with your life or your relations to others, it is some kind of OCD, maybe mild OCD?

    I have the same issues as you in that they are not interfering with my life too much, but they are still there and they are interfering in some ways.

    In my case, I simply cannot stand other people touching my things, especially my books.
    All I ask is for people who come to my house to not touch everything, and especially to not snoop around my library.

    I have the same issue as you in that people then do it on purpose. It stresses me out to where I could get a panic attack. In some cases, I just want to yell at them irrationally. I, however, do consider this OCD, though just mild, and I consider it that because I can tell it interferes with my interactions with others or with my behavior.
    I have arranged my entire house in such a way that people cannot find or touch the books and things that matter to me the most. I do not have a single book in my living room, even though I am running out of space in my library because I know people will touch them and flip through them and it will freak me out.

    I will also go to lengths such as no longer invite people at my house if they touch my things and don't respect my boundaries.
    If someone insists that I, for example, lend them a book and I say no and they keep insisting, my OCD can go to the point where I will just no longer talk to that person. I will put an end to that friendship if they insist upon borrowing things I simply cannot lend because it affects me psychologically.

    I have pondered for a while where that issue stemmed from and I realized that it started when my family life went out of control when I was a teenager. And I think it started with me needed to feel like I had control over something. The problem is that my issues are still here and I still cannot rationalize my behavior when others come to my house and touch my things.
    And my problem is that all I am asking if for people to stop touching what is mine, but they will not respect that simple request and in some cases they will tease me about it, tell me I am faking it, or say I'm annoying.

    My husband, however, respects that, which is why I can live with him. My issue is bad enough that I would not be able to live with someone who doesn't respect that I have a problem I cannot control.

    So if your life is affected in any way by what others see in you as "OCD," then you might have a mild case of it. It is wrong of them not to respect that and not avoid doing the little things you ask that can help release your stress.
     
    #10 BiGoth1982, Sep 19, 2018
    Last edited: Sep 19, 2018
  11. quebec

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    Canterpiece & Everyone Else..... I'll speak as someone who does have OCD. I have been diagnosed by a psychiatrist and a therapist and have been on medication for about six months. While there are many different ways that OCD manifests, the one most common trait is the compulsion that forces you to perform a certain act. The compulsion can become so strong that you can not do anything else until you have done whatever you feel compelled to do. That's what can make OCD so destructive...it can completely interrupt your life until you give in and do it. Then you must do it again, and again... I am grateful that medication is available and that it has eliminated about 90% of my compulsions...I can handle 10% without too much difficulty! Many of you have written about things that make you extremely anxious...anxiety is a very real thing that can make life very difficult. However, in most cases it is not OCD. I'd sure hate to see someone dealing with anxiety have OCD dropped on them too! In the last six months or so I have found myself becoming really defensive when someone jokingly says "Oh, I have OCD because I always do xxxx". OCD isn't a joke, it can destroy your life. I've been "training" myself not to snap back at someone who says things like that and, when the situation allows, to explain a little to them of how difficult it can be.
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  12. BiGoth1982

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    That's very instructive. Thank you!
    I think I will refer to my issues as anxiety now. It seems to fit really well.
     
  13. Ruby Dragon

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    I like the volume on a radio at odd numbers, especially "13", with the exception of "10" - Which just seems like such an "organized" number. When I eat sweets, I eat three, five, or seven of them and then stop. Why? Because that's just how I roll. I have a certain bed-time routine because I like order and without it, I roll around for hours sometimes. I like having three pens at work. If one is missing, I feel restless because I want to have THREE pens. Why? Because I like to have spares. None of these things mean I suffer from OCD. It just means I like order.

    I'm bipolar, and I hate how people casually say they're bipolar simply because they have mood swings. Honey, EVERYBODY has mood swings - not everyone is bipolar. I self harm (though I'm proud to say, I haven't done so in many months). I hate when people always have to one-up me. "Oh, I've done this or that to myself before" - In a dismissive tone, like what I said was just looking for attention. So I feel your pain. REAL OCD sufferers probably feel deprived of their mental health diagnosis because so many people casually refer to themselves as having OCD just because they like things a certain way. I must admit, I probably have no clue about OCD and what the sufferers go through on a daily basis. But I know that I do not have OCD
     
  14. Broccoli

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    I was like this for a large part of my life but with even instead of odd numbers! Three pens would have caused me lots of stress - I'd want to have four or two!!
     
  15. gintoki

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    I suffer from High functioning autism and have been diagnosed as such. I will say i think people knowing anything about OCD is better than the negative connotations that are associated with the autistic spectrum. Honestly first response i get is 'oh so you are retarded' and 'you can be social its just practice' and teachers 'look at me when im talking to you' Especially with High functioning autism people just assume you are normal and are being difficult for the sake of it. Square peg in a round hole is accurate. I have tried telling people im on the autistic spectrum before and most people don't even seem to know there is an autistic spectrum and that autism is a sliding scale in severity. Most people just see autism and assume you have special talents and are dumb. The media also doesn't help saying things like 'this guy murdered 2 people ..... oh and he has autism' like that is relivant at all... I totally understand how you feel mental conditions are so poorly understood by the general population most people just pick up stuff on the news and then never bother to question it.
     
  16. Canterpiece

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    This is true, especially when you consider how trolls often use autistic as an insult. I sometimes watch this Youtuber who has autism and he wrote a book which trolls targeted with abuse and several bought up his autism in a negative manner. Truly disheartening. I think a common misconception is that autistic= completely oblivious, and that just isn't true.

    I have difficulties with processing visual information (particularly numerical) and have a harder time remembering basic arithmetic. Although I'm not officially diagnosed with anything, I strongly suspect either dyscalculia or visual processing disorder. All the generalised tests I've had administered to me by education officers have pinpointed this as an area I struggle with. People usually assume that I'm just lazy rather than stupid, but I've had a few people question my intelligence before due to my difficulties in mathematics. I know it's not quite the same, but I can certainly relate to being underestimated by others.

    During Secondary school I had a teacher that would insist on eye contact as well. I tended to avoid it because subconsciously I had this phobia of disappointing my teachers. Although it was somewhat irrational, I feared that they'd snap at me if I got a question wrong, so my solution was to avoid eye contact as much as I could in the hopes that they wouldn't ask me any questions and therefore I couldn't fail. However, my art teacher caught onto this and whenever I had the guts to ask him a question he would only answer it if I maintained eye contact whilst doing so. I eventually managed it. Overtime I got over this fear, one that all started when my school counsellor had a breakdown and I blamed myself. I thought "That's just what you do, you ruin people's lives by accident, perhaps you should just stay quiet and let those that have a clue take charge so you don't cause anymore harm". But of course, it wasn't my fault. I just didn't realise that at the time.

    Sometimes people think I'm being difficult just for the sake of it, that I'm just being fussy with food and avoiding certain places because I'm just a jerk. When actually I'm trying to avoid getting overloaded and loosing my cool. I don't like it when I lose control like I do sometimes, people say "Well why are you getting all stressed about it if you don't like it?" and I wish it were that simple.

    If only I could just turn off all my sensitivities for a day. To detach from the world for a quick moment. "Why do you let such things bother you?" I dunno, really. My fight or flight kicks in even when I'm in a safe environment, and when that happens I don't always think rationally. Occasionally people say "Well I'm going to continue doing this thing that's putting you on edge because that's life and you have to deal with it, I'm not going to make exceptions for you". As if they're doing me a favour. Then they get confused when I start acting freaked out.

    Very true, unfortunately.
     
  17. RavenK

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    I agree! People should stop using OCD as if it was just being clean and organized. People have seen members of my family (who have grown up with somehow being perfectionists and needing organization for years, my sister getting the worst of it) and assuming "Oh, you have OCD." The thing is, as far as we know, none of us have actually have OCD. It's annoying and perpetuates myths.
     
  18. fadedstar

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    Although I was never diagnosed officially I'm pretty sure I had OCD (it was really bad) from the ages of about 16-21 and I still occasional relapse but it's nowhere near what it once was. I used to have these weird counting rituals and if it didn't "feel right" I would have to completely start over until it did. Sometimes I would repeat the same two numbers in my head for several minutes thinking that if "I didn't do it right" something terrible would happen to me or people I care about. I eventually overcame it by forcing myself not to do the compulsive behaviors and desensitising myself to the anguish created by ignoring my compulsive behaviors.
     
  19. quebec

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    fadedstar.....I so understand the counting! That was a major part of my OCD. Almost everything around me had to be "assigned" a number based on the angles or shapes, etc. I had to count the number of LEDs that made up the time on my digital clock every night before I could go to sleep. The digit "1" was made up of two LEDs, so the time 1:11 had an "assigned" number of 6. 10:08 had an "assigned" number of 21. If I went to bed before 10:08, I had to watch the clock until then and count it before I could even try to sleep. I am sooo grateful for meds that have eliminated almost all of the compulsions! :old_smile: I encourage anyone who seriously thinks that they may be suffering from OCD to have it checked out. I've been told that it's caused by an chemical/hormone imbalance in the brain...it's not something to be ashamed about and it can almost always be helped with the right medication. Don't let it continue to wreck your life...you can get better!
    .....David :gay_pride_flag:
     
  20. Loves books

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    I do things like sort my skittles by colour or eat food in a certain way. If something I usually do is done by someone who does it differently I will redo it. My sister keeps telling me I have OCD but I won't freak out if things aren't a certain way I'll just be annoyed. I have a specific routine for going to bed that takes about a half hour and I'm uncomfortable staying in others houses because I might not be able to do what I do at home but it's fine. I've seen tv shows about OCD and even if I do wash my hands a million times a day it's because I have a dog who goes looking for gross stuff to roll in and not because I'm OCD.